


Fate

by twicesgrey



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/M, Fluffy, a bit of comedy, light - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2020-11-26 20:23:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20936216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twicesgrey/pseuds/twicesgrey
Summary: I love you but…Her words continuously bounce around my heart. But. Every time I hit the word it feels like a dull knife slowly sinking into my flesh.I love you but…I love you but…I love you but…In the beginning, it was fun when we hid our relationship like a dirty little secret. The stolen glances were exciting. The little ‘accidental’ brushes of her hand against mine every time we passed by each other in public felt like a jolt of electricity coursing through me. We’ve found a little blind spot in the company building where the CCTV cameras won’t catch us and we claimed it our secret place.Exhilarating. That’s what we are.That’s what we were.





	1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

I take in a deep breath, filling my lungs with the necessary amount of oxygen and it still doesn’t feel enough.

I take the first step, the second, the third, and so on until I come face to face with security asking me for my purpose of visit.

I tell him my name and that I have a meeting with the executives of the music department at 9am. He points me towards the concierge in the middle of the lobby and I thank him before I walk away.

The concierge was polite when I told him the same thing I had told the security by the front door. He takes his sweet time on the computer while I take advantage of the moment by carefully examining the company logo on the wall in front of me.

JYP Entertainment.

I’m actually here. I never dreamt of joining a Big 3 company but here I am. I still don’t know what to feel about all this. I’m excited for sure. Nervous? A lot.

A week ago, I got an e-mail from the company inquiring about whether I would be interested to sell some of my music to them. I’m no small time music composer but I work independently…from home. I like my quiet space. I’ve done music for other musicians, composed soundtracks for television and film, and not to toot my own horn but I’ve won awards both locally and internationally and I’ve yet to hit my 30’s. I might be a musical prodigy but all of that means nothing if I didn’t work hard and that is where I take most pride in.

I’m a hard worker. I want something, I work for it.

This opportunity though is different. The songs are already made, if I sell the rights to the company, they can tweak it to their hearts desire. It’ll be up to them unless they call me in to help out. In the company e-mail I received, they’ve listed songs that I’ve composed that they wanted to buy the rights to. Thirty. Thirty songs. All of them will be used by one group. TWICE.

TWICE. Yeah, I had to say it again because TWICE. Okay, third time’s the charm.

I’m a composer. I’m not a snob. I enjoy every sort of structured sound I come across with. TWICE’s playlist is my go-to happy music. So it wasn’t really that hard to "say yes" to the invitation. I’m not even ashamed to say that I didn’t even think ‘twice’ about it. Ha.

I read the attached contract, twice, and replied to the e-mail right away.

What do the kids call it these days? Whipped. Whipped culture. Yes, I am whipped for TWICE.

For one member in particular. You already know who it is but we’ll get to that in a bit.

I’m snapped out of my short daydream when the concierge confirms my 9am appointment. He asks for my ID, inputs stuff into his computer, asks me to look at a camera somewhere near a vase (apparently it took a picture of my confused face for security purposes), then I was handed a visitors ID, given instructions for which elevator to take, what floor to get off on, take a right, walk straight ahead and to my left I will be greeted by another concierge.

Here’s the thing: I might be a good composer but I’m not really good with directions especially if relayed to me like a GPS at 5x speed.

So naturally, I’m going to be lost.

At this point you might be thinking that I’m not good enough for your girl if I’m directionally challenged like this.

Here me out – the best things happen when you take the road less taken.

In this case, it was a floor.

I pushed the wrong button to the wrong floor and I knew right away because when the elevator doors opened, for a moment I thought I was in heaven. The first person I see? Dahyun. Just being her beautiful self. She's the most beautiful person I’ve seen in my life. An exaggeration? Absolutely not. My young heart that fawned over cartoon Pocahontas would beg to disagree but adult me? Agrees 100%.

There she was in front of me. The girl whose discolored photocard I had in my wallet since 2015 is breathing the same centralized air-conditioned air as me. And the second best thing? She was in her signature white oversized top and red track pants. The best thing? She didn’t smile.

How is that the best thing you wonder? Because there was something in the way she looked at me. We both knew that this was the moment that’ll change us both forever. The air shifted, no one dared to speak to break the moment, and no one neither moved nor breathed.

I wish this was another exaggeration but time stood still and it wasn’t even the awkward silence you’d expect. If anything, it felt…right.

“Hello.” I broke the silence.

“Hello.” she said back politely and there was a ghost of a tiny smile behind her lips but I caught it, forever ingrained in my mind, “Up?” she asks.

“Yes,” I replied even though I wasn’t sure. I briefly looked up at the small monitor indicating what floor we were on and it said 7th.

She gets on and I move a bit aside to make room for her because she felt larger than life.

“Floor?” I asked, my hand suspended near the floor buttons that’ll take her wherever she needed to be.

“9th. Thank you.” I push the button to the 9th floor and the elevator doors close right away.

I was hyper aware of her every move so when we both took a deep breath at the same time, I looked at her through the reflection on the elevator door wall and lo and behold, she was looking at me as well.

We both smiled at each other and I couldn’t help but chuckle. She had both hands adorably tucked in her pockets and I knew I was screwed when I thought it was the most adorable thing in the world.

The ride both felt like it took forever and too short but the elevator doors opened and Dahyun immediately started walking out. I was examining the back of her head when she suddenly turned around and reached for the elevator buttons on the outside to keep the doors from closing.

“You’re new here.” she was suddenly so formal. Her eyebrows were slightly drawn together.

“Yes. I have a meeting with the music department.” I knew she wasn't asking but I still answered while hoping I sounded at least a bit more formal than I had acted a while ago.

“Hit the six, turn right.” the corners of her mouth drew up and I was hit with a warm yet teasing smile, all formalities gone.

She knows I'm lost and I'm not even a tiny bit ashamed.

“Thank you.” I smile right back because I couldn’t help myself.

“You’re welcome.” And we just smile at each other while the elevator doors closed between us.

There it was, our first ‘moment’, our first secret in a long list of secrets.

*******


	2. Piano Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've been working with the company for a month now.
> 
> Number of times I've seen Dahyun: 1.
> 
> Once. 
> 
> To be honest, I wasn't expecting on seeing much of her but what I really would never have imagined is the way I met 7/9 of TWICE. It's waaay beyond ideal but I would never trade the experience for anything in the world because this is the kind of chaos you'll remember as long as you live.

CHAPTER 2 PIANO MAN

I’ve been working with the company for a month now. Since that fateful day where I signed a contract immediately, I’ve sold them the rights for 30 songs and 10 additional ones that have no lyrics yet. Basically, those are just backbones.

Now I’m contractually obligated to appear whenever I'm summoned when my songs are involved. In just a week, I’ve met all in-house producers and we’ve done a lot of music related stuff.

This industry works fast. No time is wasted and a clear schedule is cut out months and months ahead. Nothing is unplanned in this business. When I say nothing, I mean even those ‘scandals’? Planned.

Even if I’ve been in this business for years, things always seem to change no matter how everything is pre-planned to the tinniest detail.

Sometimes, I’m scheduled to come in on a certain day but last minute things happen and things get moved around. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that part of the business.

For example, I came in today because the Monday schedule had been postponed due to unforeseen circumstances so now it’s Sunday and I’m sitting in one of the vocal rehearsal rooms on the 9th floor, playing with the keyboard while waiting for one of the producers to finish his meeting so we can go about business as usual.

I usually stay in this vocal training room because the keyboard feels different than the others. If you play an instrument you'd understand. It's like an android user using an iPhone or using the shower at your friends house. It's just different in a way. My brain constantly creates music and I’m not really sure when to turn it off or when to not be triggered by anything so it’ll stop putting notes together. A piano comes in handy when it's within arms reach.

There’s a quote by Ezra Bayda that I really like which is “If you pay attention, everything becomes your teacher.” In my case, everything can be an inspiration. Believe it or not, I’ve written a song based off of a trash can, that has charted pretty well.

However, this week, I’ve finished nothing. It’s like this sometimes. It doesn’t happen often but it does come. If this stretches on for too long, I’m going to start panicking.

The door suddenly bursts open and someone barges into my solitary confinement. How dare she.

She dares because she’s Im Nayeon. Apparently, this one gets lost a lot too. This isn’t the first time she’s accidentally barged into a room.

I was about to stand up and greet her when she walks straight to the table at the farthest end of the room, plops her bag and a plastic bag full of what seems to be take out food on the table and drops herself messily on a chair.

I'm caught between greeting her or wait to see if she knows that I'm here and she's just ignoring me.

She looks like she's about to make a phone call when I get a confirmation that she does because she's put it on speaker phone and deposits it on the table while it rings.

Someone on the other line answers after the fourth ring and Nayeon drops her head on the table, eyes closed, facing me.

"Are you there already?"

It seems to be Jeongyeon.

"Yeah, my arms hurt. I brought so much food."

She still has her eyes closed, her arms just dangling by her side, hands almost to the floor.

"Unnie, did you get the spicy beef?" That high pitched cute voice is unmistakably Sana's.

"Yeah. No stopovers, okay? Just go straight here. I'm not starting without -"

She opens her eyes. Blinks once, twice, and then slowly raises her head, just staring at me like I'm a new species of bacteria under a microscope.

"Unnie!" Jeongyeon's panicked voice fills the quiet room. "Don't touch Sana's beef! It's extremely spicy!"

I stand up to greet her but she's quicker. She grabs her phone fast as her shriek fills the entire room and possibly the whole floor and that's the last thing I remember before everything goes black.  
______

"Hey. Hey..."

"Don't move him. He could be seriously injured."

"He 'is' seriously injured. He's knocked out and his nose is bleeding."

"Hashtag Nayeon unnie is going to jail party."

"Don't joke about that stuff! We're not even sure if he'll wake up."

"Mina, what's the diagnosis?"

"He's breathing. The bleeding has stopped. The impact really knocked him out so let's hope he doesn't have a concussion. Also, Nayeon unnie, your aim has immensely improved since you pitched last time."

"Hashtag Nayeon unnie will never live down this dumbassery."

"I didn't even know he was here! I had this space reserved."

"Then why is he here?"

"And who is he?"

"New trainee?"

"He looks kinda old for a new trainee."

"Yeah, 23?"

"I'm 25."

I hear a collective gasp and another shriek I'm now fully accustomed with.

"He's alive!"

"Hashtag Nayeon unnie doesn't have to worry about dropping the soap."

I try to open my eyes slowly, there's a throbbing pain in my face that I can't explain.

I see Mina's face first. "Please don't move. We've called for medical assistance to have you checked."

"I'm really sorry for what happened. Are you okay?" I just noticed Nayeon is kneeling beside me. Her eyes and cheeks are glimmering with tears.

"He's very obviously not okay."

"No worries. I'm okay." I try to get up but Mina holds me down gently by my shoulder.

"It's best if you don't move. The company doctor will be here in a minute."

I listen and close my eyes. The incandescent light is starting to make my headache worse.

There's a knock on the door and I hear them scrambling with sounds of plastic crinkling and panicked "Cover it with something!" murmurs. These girls will be the worst kind of criminals.

"Smells delicious in here." says the voice of an older man.

I try to sniff but my nose is blocked and all I smell is metal...rust?

"So what do we have here?"

I pry my eyes open and see an older gentleman kneeling beside me. My curious eyes travel around the room and I can see Chaeyoung looking like she's dangling from Jeongyeon's shoulder. Momo and Sana are both standing at the back, peeking from behind Mina and Nayeon's shoulders.

The elderly gentleman carefully checks me "Nose doesn't seem to be broken and the bleeding has completely stopped. How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Two, sir."

"Follow my fingers with your eyes." And I do as he slowly moves it left to right, right to left.

"I'll help you up, we'll do it slowly on the count of three."

Before he starts counting, Nayeon comes to my side and helps me up.

I suddenly feel dizzy but I try to get on my feet when I'm instructed to and I somehow end up sitting on a chair.

I listen to them as the doctor asks how we ended up in this situation. According to Nayeon, she came in, not expecting me to be here and not noticing me right away because I was sitting on the bench that's facing the piano.

Initially, she thought I was a ghost but when I was about to get up (to greet her), she thought I was an intruder so she grabbed her phone, and with precise aim, threw it at me, hitting me square in the face, making my nose bleed, and eventually knocking me out.

I can hear unsuccessfully suppressed snickering before the good doctor starts examining me again.

"You don't have a concussion but give me a call when your headache gets worse and persists and you start vomiting within the hour." then he starts rattling off more instructions.

The next thing I know, the doctor has left and I'm stuck in this confined space while 6 pairs of eyes are examining me like they've never seen a human being before.

____

Have you ever met a celebrity? Because every time I do, almost all of them have this invisible glass around them like they're still on TV. They'll give off this feeling of being within arms reach but still so far away and unbelievably untouchable.

6/9 of TWICE? Nope. None of that. Before you come after me with a pitch fork, let me explain. The girls are beautiful. Dare I say even more beautiful without make up and in their rehearsal clothes. They're very relaxed and looking like a group of friends who came together after school to hang out.

This is a breath of fresh air if I could actually breathe normally through my nose.

The door opens and Jihyo comes in carrying something in her hand. She greets me first with a very worried look in her eyes and hands me what seems to be an ice pack then instructs me to put it on my head. I oblige immediately and once I start to feel the cold, it automatically soothes me and my eyes voluntarily close.

It's so quiet I momentarily forgot there are still other people in the room. I open my eyes and stand up. Formally greet them and introduce myself.

"I'm really sorry for what happened." Nayeon was almost in tears again.

"No worries. Hashtag Nayeon isn't going to jail party."

The girls burst out laughing while Nayeon whines and wipes a single stray tear on her cheek.

"I really thought you died."

"I'm sorry, it's my fault too. I just didn't know if you saw me or if I had greeted you immediately when you came in you could've been even more startled and dropped your food."

"How do you know I have food?"

"The name of the restaurant is on the plastic bag."

Everyone's attention immediately focuses on the bag of food, suddenly realizing that they're all here to eat.

"Please join us. There's more than enough food for all of us." Jihyo kindly offers while already unloading the food onto the table.

Chaeyoung passes me a box while Momo hands me chopsticks wrapped in napkins and Sana puts a bottle of water in front of me.

"Are you a trainee?" Sana asks.

"You're so rude. Did you even introduce yourself?" Jeongyeon reprimands.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Sana." and then everyone follows her and introduces themselves.

I explain my main business for being here and I get enthusiastic nods.

"We've already heard all your songs!" As expected, Chaeyoung says excitedly.

"Did you like any of them?"

"I enjoyed them all but there are quite a few that I really hope would end up on the next album."

I'm extremely humbled and flattered as they all agree.

"Thank you. I'm very happy to hear that. If you do end up recording them or write lyrics for them, you're going to see a lot of me so I apologize in advance. I don't always look this messy, I swear."

"Don't worry, I think it adds a lot of character." Nayeon says.

"Don't bother softening the blow, the damage's already been done." Jeongyeon says with a mouth full of food.

"You want to take this outside?" Nayeon starts gathering her sleeves to her elbows, challenging Jeongyeon to a fistfight.

Jeongyeon remains unbothered, stuffing her face with more food like a champ. "Sit down and eat your food or you won't be able to practice right away then you'll whine about having indigestion again." and she proceeds to imitate what I suppose is Nayeon going through the woes of stomach pain.

Mina, who was in the middle of drinking her water almost spilled it for bursting into a chuckle. I find myself chuckling right along with her.

"Why do you do this to me in front of a person we've just met!"

"You almost killed him, you're practically family now." Jeongyeon swallows the remaining food in her mouth and goes at it again. "You did that "How to hide your fart" video, and you still have the gall to act like your name isn't tainted?" Wow, Jeongyeon doesn't mince her words.

"Hey, all the oppadeul and unnies girl -" Here we go, Nayeon coming back strong.

"If you don't stop now, you're gonna get that song stuck in your head the whole day." Jihyo breaks them up and it's pretty effective.

There's a collective reaction of disgust until Sana shouts "Someone please play a song! My brain is starting to remember it!"

I immediately place my food on the table and go to the piano. I play a simple song they all know and the next thing I know, they're all singing to it.

I don't stop and they keep singing like it's their concert. These girls know how to have fun and entertain themselves. They're using chopsticks and water bottles as microphones.

I'm impressed by Jihyo and Jeongyeon hitting the right notes despite all that food in their mouths.

The song comes to an end and the room is turned into complete chaos. They're acting like they're wrapping up their concert and it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life.

I'm surprised when they start introducing me and Nayeon goes "Let's give it up for our piano man!" And they cheer and do fan chants so naturally, I play along by playing a quick yet complicated and extremely fun piece.

By their reaction, I can tell they're pretty impressed. I wrap it up and take a bow.

We all clap at each other and Jihyo wraps up our mini concert. "Once, thank you for coming! Please get home safely. We love you!"

"Until next time!" Momo says cutely to our invisible audience.

This feeling right here, when you're in the presence of fellow musicians, is the best feeling ever.

"Oppa, you're so cool with the piano!" Sana proclaims.

Okay, I'm officially their oppa now which is really cool. I will defend them with my life from this point on.

"You should meet Dahyun! She's the best at piano." Momo suggests and everyone agrees.

Now, on to the first secret, do I tell them we've already met or not? If I do, they'll ask me how and I'd have to tell them I got lost and they'll know that I'm directionally challenged. Okay, I'm not really ready to share that bit of information.

Or I could find a way to subtly ask where Dahyun is. Smooth and clever. Another mental high five for me.

"So I heard. Is she not coming here?" Smooth, man.

"She's out with Tzuyu for a schedule but they'll be here later for practice."

So I might actually see her after a month. Finally.

"We have to hurry up. We don't have much time left." Mina, always so sensible, reminds them.

We return to our food while chatting here and there and I've come to realize that the girls I've been watching for years on tv and on the internet are pretty much the same people.

We laugh and talk about stuff like we've known each other for years and they ask me things people wouldn't really ask someone they just met. Well, as Jeongyeon has said, Nayeon almost killed me so we're practically family now.

After a while, the plates have been polished and Dahyun hasn't shown up. It's already time for their rehearsal.

I guess, I'm not seeing her after all.

********

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading Chapter 2 of Fate. This has been, by far, the most fun I've had in writing. So I hope you had fun reading it as well.


	3. The Producer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 40 or what I refer to as the first act of our Play.
> 
> Another secret on top of another secret. This time, someone is in on it.
> 
> But at least I finally got to see her again.

Fate Chapter 3 The Producer

It’s D-Day. Dooms Day? Right then it didn’t feel like that.

That day I would always refer to D-Day, no, it’s not Dahyun Day but it was the day which started the first Act of our Play. This is where we had the silent understanding to not talk about the actual day we met – which we already know as Secret #1.

Why, you wonder? I don’t know either. Maybe we'll find out later?

*********

Day 40

I was in one of the many conference rooms, the big one they call it, sitting at the end of the long conference table looking at changes in some of the songs we’re about to tackle today. Sitting across from me is the man who will produce TWICE’s next album. He’s been scrolling through his phone nonstop since I got here, airpods in his ears, his head bobbing up and down on occasion. He’s a very expressive man, doesn’t speak much, but I can tell from the ever changing expressions on his face whether he likes or dislikes whatever he’s listening to. Right now, he seems to be enjoying whatever it is.

Going back to the pile of notes in front of me, I go back to one of the pages that I’ve come back to the most. It’s a music sheet but no lyrics yet. This is one of the 10 songs I’ve been talking about that needs lyrics. There’s a huge note at the bottom from “PD-nim” himself. He wrote “this song makes my heart bleed and then fixes me right after.”

I had the biggest smile after reading that compliment and I still smile whenever I read it. Like right now. I was relishing in my fanboy moment when the door opens and people start piling in.

I stand up to greet them. Managers, music people, someone I’ve only seen today, Nayeon looking like she had the worst night of her life, Jihyo behind her who looked like the exact opposite, then Mina who also greets everyone in her quiet voice.

I wait for everyone to take their seat before taking mine and the room is now buzzing. We haven’t even filled half the chairs but there’s an energy that’s both exciting and addicting.

The door opens again and in comes Jeongyeon and Sana laughing and teasing each other which makes me smile as well. Another round of greetings and the door opens again. This time, it’s another round of higher up’s, music folks, and some other people I’ve only remembered are from the finance department. Basically, top heads from the division that handles the group are here.

I look around counting the almost full room. Three more heads are missing, when I realize who they are, my heart starts pounding. You know when you run fast and then stop abruptly that your head starts pounding as if it grew two sizes too big and you can feel your heart beating like it’s struggling to pump blood to every part of your body? If you multiply that feeling by ten, that’s how I felt at that moment.

It’s been weeks since I’ve seen Dahyun and it was an absolute struggle to not think about her. Did I succeed in not daydreaming about bumping into her again? Nope. As a matter of fact, when I got the memo for this meeting, I started losing sleep. During those times, I started writing more music than I ever did before.

I didn’t realize I was staring at the door until it opened and it caught me a bit by surprise. I sat up straighter and waited for her to come into my line of sight.

Everything started moving in slow motion for me. A manager comes in, then Chaeyoung, then Tzuyu, and the door closes.

She’s not here.

“Dahyunnie?” it was Jihyo.

Chaeyoung leans towards their Leader and whispers in her ear.

“Ah.” that was Jihyo’s only reply.

My brain was scrambling for answers. She was supposed to be here. Maybe she’s running a bit late? Is she okay?

The door swings open again and I almost get whiplash when I turn my head to try and see who it is. I was waiting for someone blonde, tiny, and fair but it’s the exact opposite. Tall, dark haired, tanned. Yep, that is definitely not her.

Everyone greets PD-nim as he takes his seat at the head of the conference table. He pulls out the chair, while looking around the room. I’m almost sad when he starts the meeting and Dahyun hasn’t shown up yet.

We go about the main topics of today’s discussion. These meetings can go the whole day. We’re discussing pre-production, production proper, and post production. That’s a lot of month’s worth of coverage. Time goes fast; we’ve dented the list of topics to be discussed at a surprising speed.

We go into discussing the direction they want their music to go into. Every member of the group gets a say in everything. Their opinions are heard and if they want something or maybe dislike it, that’s taken into consideration.

This is also where I come in. There’s a long list of songs they want to use to fill this album. Some of mine are included. Everyone turns their head to me when the PD asks for my input. I go into professional mode and flawlessly answer everyone’s question thrown at me until the sound of the door opening stops me mid-speech. Everyone looks at the same direction. There she is. The only person I’ve been waiting for trying to, unsuccessfully, enter the room as subtly as possible.

She hasn’t seen me yet but my eyes track her movement. Jihyo and Nayeon both move at the same time to make room for her in between them while a manager rolls a chair for her to sit on. She greets everyone and apologizes before taking her seat.

Seems like she’s okay while I’m not because I’ve momentarily forgotten that I was trying to answer an important question when I realize that all eyes are on me again and the PD is looking at me intently.

“As I was saying…” and I easily slip back to professional mode, applauding myself internally for how smooth I was. I was giving myself mental high fives every time I answered questions while retaining my composure because trying to not look at Dahyun, who was intently looking at me, from across the room has been one of the biggest challenges in my adult career.

A few more hours pass and we take an hour-long break and people leave the room as if it was an earthquake drill. I was about to stand when the producer asked me what I wanted to eat.

“No idea yet.” I answer while gathering my papers in the folder.

“I’ll order something for us. Join me here. It’ll save us more time.” He didn’t even look up from his phone so I agreed and started walking around the room doing stretches.

Now it’s just the two of us again. His airpods are back on so that means no conversation. Good. My throat is starting to hurt anyway. This silence is welcoming. I walk around the room to stretch my legs. I’m not a big fan of sitting down for prolonged periods of time so I stretch every muscle in my body to start feeling human again.

I look up at the digital clock and it says 5 minutes have passed when the door opens. I’m expecting our lunch delivery but something better has come. You guessed it, it’s her.

She peeks her head through the door and her eyes catch mine immediately. She’s wearing a smile like she’s in some sort of trouble and then she carefully enters the room.

“Forgot something” she says to me and goes straight to the seat she previously occupied and pulls it out, ducks down and grabs her purse, holding it up as she says “Found it.”

As smooth as I was before, this time, I was not. Do I say something? She looks like she’s waiting for me to say something. At a loss for words, I hold up both of my hands and give her two thumbs up which is far more enthusiastic than a guy in a Mentos commercial.

That’s a short lesson on “How to look like a fool in front of your crush 101”.

I’m caught by surprise when she laughs.

Once again, all the air escapes my lungs from the sound of her laughter and the sight of her beautiful smile. I start to wonder if I’ll ever get used to it.

She looks at me again, still with the thousand watt smile, and my brain answers “Never, never in a million lifetimes.”

“Are you going for lunch?” My dumb self taking the "ask the obvious, look ridiculous" route. Of course she’s going to eat lunch, that’s why we’re having a ‘lunch break’.

“Yeah, just downstairs.” she says. “Would you like to join us?”

That catches us both off-guard. I mean, we’re co-workers and that’s the polite thing to do. She was just being polite. Right? I've already shared a meal with her members. Does she know about it?

I see the hesitation in her eyes, maybe she’s thinking it was too much to ask someone, even if co-workers, you barely know to lunch.

I slightly turn my head to point towards the producer who is still on his phone, “My date’s already got us delivery.” I say in attempt to lighten the mood.

It does the job as the awkwardness disappears immediately.

“I heard the menu today’s good.” I was making an attempt to keep her here longer.

“Oh, you’ve seen it?” she’s genuinely curious.

“I had breakfast there this morning. I was told the lunch menu was going to be good because the PD was going to eat there.” Now I actually want to head down there myself.

“They make it extra special when the PD is around.” she says and she suddenly has a dreamy look on her face. “Last time they had beef stew that I ate so much of I could barely get up and go back to practice.” She was reminiscing about food and the longing for that stew was written all over her face.

“Maybe they’ll have it again today.” I wanted to give her hope.

“I hope not or else I’m going to eat so much I’ll get sleepy and will most likely space out during the remainder of the meeting.” she shakes her head as if she’s waking up from a daydream.

“I’ll make a scene if I see you start dozing off.”

“You’re sitting at the farthest end, how are you going to do that?”

“O ye of so little faith.”

She laughs again and yeah, her laughter is now officially my favourite sound in the world.

She moves closer to me. Her eyes tracking down my face slowly. This close, I can smell her perfume and I could hear my heart beating in my ears.

"What happened to your nose?" I'm not sure why she's sounding out of breath, her gaze hasn't left my slightly bruised nose. She looks a lot concerned and when her eyes meet mine, I could see worry behind them.

A knock at the door interrupts us, she steps back immediately to put distance between us and the delivery man from downstairs comes in with plates piled high on top of each other.

“You should get back to your date.” She says, her eyes not leaving mine.

“I should get back to my date.” I’m not breaking this staring game either.

I could hear the plates getting offloaded onto the table and the producer calls for Dahyun.

“Dahyun, come join us.”

Both of us look at the producer who’s now arranging the plates and removing the plastic wrap. The delivery guy greets Dahyun before leaving.

“Thank you but the members are waiting for me downstairs. Just went back to get my purse.” she holds up her purse again.

“All righty. Eat well, okay?” the producer is in his early 40’s but he sounded just like a father. They weren’t kidding when they said the people who work here look after the girls like family.

“I will and you too.” she says the last part looking at me and while slowly walking backwards towards the door.

I nod because that’s all I can do. I’m both suddenly sad that she’s leaving and extremely happy to have had another moment with her.

That moment is Secret #2.

Before I know it, she’s out the door and I find myself standing in front of the pile of food in front of me considering whether we’ll be able to polish this all off.

“Have a seat” the producer says, now all friendly.

So I do and he hands me a spoon and a pair of chopsticks. My mouth waters at the sight of food but one in particular catches my attention – the beef stew.

“The PD is having lunch downstairs so the menu is special.” he hands me a bottle of water.

“This is a feast.”

“Only the best for the best.”

I look up and see the producer looking at me with a huge smile on his face but there’s also something there which I do not want to get into with him.

“Dig in,” he says as he dips his spoon in the beef stew. “Be careful,” I look at him again but his eyes are on the stew. “The food is hot. Don’t burn yourself.”

I’m smart enough to know what he’s talking about and that’s how the producer and I start our list. This is our Secret #1.

*********

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading Chapter 3 of Fate. I hope you had as much as fun as I did writing this.


	4. Act 2 Reality Check

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reality checks can bum you out but just remember to always look on the bright side. Even if the girl of your dreams is on the bright side. Just don't get blinded by her.

Let me catch you up with what’s happened since Act 1, er, the meeting.

Everyone, and I mean everyone including PD-nim, was sleepy from eating too much. They had to order in coffee and sodas to keep everyone awake. Fortunately, I didn’t need to create a scene to keep everyone from dozing off like Dahyun and I had planned.

I wish I could have another moment with her but with the amount of people there and how fast they cleared the room to go practice, it was just not viable.

We’ve had a couple more meetings since then and some were solely focused on the comeback for a full album. There was a line-up of songs they wanted to use and fortunately, some of those were mine. I learned that the girls have been much more hands on with the production and producing side of things. They have more input and control and some of them even have self composed tracks that made it onto the final line-up.

Some of them will be credited as lyricists. Mina will solely write the lyrics to one of my songs and the other one goes to - drum roll please - Dahyun. There’s another track co-composed by Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu that I’ll be helping out with producing.

I have other projects besides this because I’m not in an exclusive contract with the company so to get everyone’s schedule coordinated; we’ve all decided to exchange phone numbers and emails. There’s also a group chat for each project. I’ve spoken and met with Mina several times, the group chats move along well. The other girls have even gone out of their way to take me out on meals to discuss music and sometimes just to hang out.

Don't worry, I don't let them pay.

However, I have never, not even once, been contacted by or contacted Dahyun.

Whenever we’re together in a meeting or with the other members, we’re very formal. It’s like secrets #1 and #2 have never happened.

One time, when we were having a meeting with The Producer (he’s the main producer for this album), he kept looking between us as if he was baffled by something. His eyebrows would rise higher and higher every time Dahyun and I spoke to each other.

He really went out of his way and texted me in the middle of the meeting asking “What the heck is going on?”

“What do you mean?” was my reply. Of course I answered honestly because I really didn’t know what he meant.

“You and Dahyun are really giving off weird vibes. It’s throwing me off.” his message read.

I looked at him and almost laughed. He had his mouth slightly open and his face just screamed “What is happening?” as if the world was coming to an end.

I looked around and it felt like everything was normal. Of course it’s still work and I was just being my normal professional self.

At this point you’re probably wondering when the story progresses. The Producer wondered about that too and that’s how The Producer and I had our Secret #2.

I’ve never been truly alone with Dahyun since the first time we’ve met until that day that we - The Producer, Dahyun, and I - gathered in one of the recording studios to plan the guide for the song. She says she’s written a draft but wants to keep it to herself for a while just to see if she comes up with something and in case, wants to change the direction of the song.

“It’s a confession song.” The Producer states matter of factly, looking at Dahyun like he has the universe figured out but what was more surprising was Dahyun’s reaction.

That day I found out that Dahyun isn’t good with hiding her emotions, particularly when she gets busted.

Her face says it all. She might be trying her best to mask her surprise that The Producer knows about the lyrics but it’s all there – her eyes widened, her mouth slightly open, looking like she’s about to deny it but you can tell that her brain is scrambling for the right words. Her face is flustered and her whole body just clammed up.

It is a confession song. From the way I wrote it at least. I didn’t know that Dahyun would get the same vibe from the song.

We’re waiting for her to say something and it takes her a while to get a mumble jumble of words out.

“Well…-I uh…it’s…the uh...”

The Producer looks sideways at me while Dahyun is fidgeting with the corners of the papers in front of her, rolling and unrolling them. I steal a quick glance and notice him trying to suppress a smile. He’s obviously teasing her and immensely enjoying it.

“Are you waiting for this relationship to progress? “ I thought he was going to save Dahyun from the humiliation of being found out but it looks like he’s not letting up with the teasing. He truly looks like her Dad having the crush talk with his daughter, adoringly teasing her about a boy. I have to admit that it’s really cute watching them like this.

Dahyun’s face is now beet red and her hands are moving nonstop. You know those hand gestures she does like she’s rapping? Those. I can’t help but smile at the cuteness unfolding before me.

“It’s –“ she repeatedly opens and closes her mouth like a fish out of water but no words come out. Looking at the wall clock as if she's willing it to help her find the right words. Eventually, Dahyun couldn’t bring herself to talk and just grabs a handful of her hair from both sides of her head and covers her face with it.

The Producer looks at me with the biggest smile on his face and I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“I'd love for this song to be on the album so this guy better confess before the album comes out.”

“It’s not like that.” Dahyun tries to clarify and I’m suddenly struck with the realization that Dahyun might be seeing someone and that was an unexpected kick to the gut. A curve ball I really didn’t see coming.

I’ve never considered it since thinking about stuff like that feels like I’m invading her privacy but now the idea is out in the open. She didn’t deny the fact that it was a confession song, that there isn’t a guy, and that this song isn’t about a personal experience.

That’s the way my ego is deflated to nothing. It’s not like I was hoping for anything between us and I know what a crush is and isn’t, where it starts and where it ends. This is where it ends for me.

The thing I’m better at than Dahyun is hiding my feelings. I’m still smiling on the outside, cool as a cucumber, but on the inside? It’s a whole different party.

This is the first I felt the difference in our existence. That she’s a celebrity and anyone who will ever date her will probably go through extreme scrutiny from everyone. It’s not like people’s opinions will matter but unfortunately, it could make or break her career.

If I was excited about hearing her lyrics before now I’m sort of torn in the middle. I mean, I’m about to read her feelings about a guy, who is not me, and that’s just twisting the knife deeper into my heart.

The Producer suddenly pulls out his phone “Dahyun, what’s your schedule like today?”

“It’s just this really.”

He holds his phone up and says “I really have to take this call,” and excuses himself. Before he’s out of the studio, we hear him answer until his voice is abruptly cut off by the door closing.

And then there were two.

I have to accept my fate with a heavy heart and move on, and stay on the professional side of things. I guess the photo card in my wallet will have to find a new home. I can’t help but smile to myself when I remember my friend warning me about falling for someone who’s out of my league, in this case, way beyond my league.

Now I understand why it’s been so easy to be friends with her members but not with her. I was harbouring feelings I shouldn’t be having. So I steer my vehicle back to my professional lane and take this on as professional as possible. Professional. Yep, no more of that crush thing. Only professionals.

“Are you going to record the guide yourself?”

“I already made a deal with Jeongyeon unnie so she’s going to do it.”

“I see.”

And it’s just dead air between us for a whole minute. Forget that comfortable silence we had during our first meeting. This is beyond awkward and I’m not even exaggerating.

She looks over her shoulder and at the door looking like she’s willing someone to burst through it and break this awkwardness.

Professional. Be a professional.

“Since you’ve written lyrics and you're composing now, is there anything else you haven’t tried with music?”

Her face immediately lights up at my question, “I’d love to learn more about the technical aspects of song writing and producing. Chaeyoung worked with Garage Band before but I’d love to learn how to operate those.” She points at the computers and sound equipments near the window of the recording booth.

“I could teach you while we wait.”

Her smile grows bigger and my mood suddenly takes a 180 degree turn. I had to dial down my happiness when I realize that I’m supposed to get over this crush not dive deeper into it whenever she aims her smile at me.

So I get up, move towards the equipment and offer her a seat.

I wait for her to sit down before I follow and then I start by asking her about the things she already knows about starting from the software we use to the more complicated stuff.

I’m amazed by the fact that she knows a lot already.

That’s what we do to pass the time and at that point, we didn’t even realize we’ve been in the studio for over an hour.

I let her tinker with a program that makes beats and watch her compose a few bars. I’m blown away by her ear for music. After she finishes, she plays it back to me and I’m truly impressed that she’s already done a solid intro and first stanza in such a short amount of time.

“We can use this.”

“For what?” she asks with the cutest confused reaction.

“For a song. This is going somewhere.” I hurry and take over by pulling the keyboard closer to me.

“What are you doing?” she scoots closer and looks over the keyboard.

“I’m saving it. The beat sounds fresh and we could play with it further when you got time.”

“Really?” she’s still in disbelief and it’s adorable.

The door opens and The Producer is back from wherever he came from.

“You guys started without me?” he pulls out a chair and slides over to my side.

“Dahyun did a track, you should listen to it.” I play it and look over at Dahyun’s nervous expression. I can tell she’s holding her breath but she’s also excited to hear what The Producer thinks about her first track.

“Save it.” he says only two bars in.

“Already did.” I answer proudly, throwing an assuring smile to a nervous Dahyun.

She looks from The Producer to me and I see relief flood her face and I smile even bigger and wider at her while nodding my head to the music she composed herself that’s filling the whole room.

She smiles back and starts to enjoy the song with us by bobbing her head. She’s still in disbelief that she actually created this. My heart swells with pride.

We’re quiet when the unfinished song comes to an end.

The Producer starts to slow clap,, smiling like the proudest Dad in the world. “Dahyun, feel free to come here anytime to finish this because this is going somewhere good."

I’m so proud for her I completely forgot all the negative feelings I had before.

We went about today’s meeting feeling lighter and more inspired and I can feel how Dahyun’s mood seemed to have been mirroring mine when I get a text from The Producer.

“Progress is looking good. I did well, didn’t I?” I look up at him and figure out that he left intentionally.

I’m still basking in this high and I’m not sure I want to come down yet. This isn’t the progress he thinks it is, but it’s a very welcome progress nonetheless so all in all, this is good. Dahyun and I just being professional acquaintances that help each other create music? Way beyond good.


	5. A Little Help from Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Progress report. Inside jokes. Impromptu wedding dates. Look how far we've come.

Today, I'm in the recording studio with Dahyun. She's a permanent resident of this studio now. She's making beats, sampling songs, and learning to compose her own music. We stay here for long hours working on music every spare time she has. She's now almost confidently operating the whole system by herself and in no time, she'll be able to finish a whole song from start to finish without any help. Don't tell her I said this but I think she might be a little addicted to music making software.

I've slowly accepted the fact that we'll remain nothing more than work friends. Wanting anything more beyond that would just be pipe dreaming. Besides, we hangout in the studio, get to share meals, talk about books, joke around. It's been really fun getting to know her and that's perfectly fine for me.

I still haven't seen the lyrics to the song she took on to write but right now, our focus is on the track she co-composed with Chaeyoung and Tzuyu which we'll refer to as 'SMC'.

Chaeyoung and Tzuyu arrive in the studio while Dahyun is busy arranging tracks. I greet them instead, leaving Dahyun in her own world.

I stand up and offer them seats. Chaeyoung slides hers beside Dahyun and admires her unnie who is fully absorbed in laying down beats to a track she's been working on since the morning.

"You look really cool right now." Chaeyoung moves her face in front of Dahyun's and the gesture takes Dahyun out of her little bubble.

"When did you get here?" Dahyun says while taking off her headphones.

"We've been here for thirty minutes and you didn't even notice?" Chaeyoung jokes while pushing Dahyun's chair away and it rolls past Tzuyu.

Dahyun doesn't get up but drags herself closer to the two with her feet and settles beside Tzuyu who pulls Dahyun's chair closer to her.

"I really didn't. Thirty minutes? Really?" 

"It's okay, we just got here." Tzuyu says brightly, "You looked really into it so I guess that's why you didn't notice us.

"I was watching your fingers move on the keyboard shortcuts and I thought that was really cool." Chaeyoung really talks animatedly, it's quite fascinating.

"Unnie, how did you learn editing with the computer?" Tzuyu asks.

"I got a lot of help from this dude." she says nonchalantly, giving a nod in my direction without looking at me, all while she stretches her arms and legs while sitting down.

Yes, I'm elated to inform you that somewhere along the way, we've dropped the formalities and now talk like bros. Have I told you how nice it is in the bro-zone? It's nice. Really nice.

However, what got me curious was the fact that the two aren't even remotely surprised. Chaeyoung's attention is already somewhere else as she nods her head repeatedly while absentmindedly kneading Tzuyu's arm as if it were a piece of bread dough. But Tzuyu? There's no subtlety with this one. You can see mischievousness in her eyes, the wheels in her brain are actively turning. She has this big teasing smile on her face while looking at me.

I stop myself before I read too much into it. It means something and I don't know what it is. I don't even know if I want to find out.

One of the things I've learned about Tzuyu these past few weeks is how straightforward she is so I guess this means something especially when Dahyun calls her out awkwardly.

"Tzuyu?" she tries to cover her smile by pursing her lips and her laugh with a low, clearing of her throat. Tzuyu's smile hasn't left, at this point, it's gotten even funnier because both her eyebrows are now raised.

"Yes, unnie?" There's a funny way she slowly turns her head when she looks at Dahyun, tilting it while waiting for her to say something.

Dahyun is just there laughing like there's an inside joke between them.

"What?" Chaeyoung is looking back and forth between Dahyun and Tzuyu with a whole clueless expression on her face.

"Well," Dahyun starts off but doesn't continue. She raises a hand halfway up and pauses, leaving her hand up in the air awkwardly, while pursing her lips to trap in laughter that wants to very much escape.

"Unnie," Tzuyu starts in a serious tone, grabs Dahyun's hand and shakes it in a formal handshaking gesture "you seem very happy since you're laughing so much."

I knew Tzuyu was funny but Tzuyu on a mission to tease Dahyun is hilarious and Dahyun just eats up the adorableness of their maknae.

"Dahyun unnie, seriously," you can tell Chaeyoung is half embarrassed at this point but she gets it. She's in on this as well.

Dahyun is miserably failing to control herself when Tzuyu starts to uncontrollably laugh along with her.

"Unnie, would you like to share to the whole class why you're so happy? Is it because I'm finally here? It is, isn't it?"

"Time is gold. We must not waste a single second" Now she's just spewing whatever she comes up with. "We should start. Like...right now. Let's go."

"Can you?" Tzuyu says slowly, teasingly and it sends Chaeyoung to the floor.

I'm not even sure why I'm smiling but I guess witnessing all of this is hilarious on it's own. The girls being happy is pretty infectious.

"Chaeyoung, seriously." Now it just seems like they're all stuck in a laughing fit. Dahyun slides over to Chaeyoung and helps her up.

Tzuyu composes herself before speaking "Let's start." but as soon as she says it, they all start laughing again.

"Sorry. I don't know why they're like this. Did you two eat before coming here? I told you not to come here on an empty stomach." she turns to the two who are still in stitches.

"You started this." Chaeyoung says between wiping her tears and catching her breath.

"Me? It was Tzuyu."

"Unnie, it was you." Chaeyoung insists.

Tzuyu dons her serious face and turns to me, "As the sole witness," she says it so formally it sends Dahyun and Chaeyoung in a coughing fit, "who started this mess?"

Without second thoughts, I just go for it.

"It was you, Miss Chou." I answer honestly, mimicking the seriousness of her expression and matching the formality of her tone.

"That is correct." the way Tzuyu says it so matter of factly sends us all laughing.

That's what we were doing when Nayeon and Jeongyeon unexpectedly show up.

"Is this how you guys work?" is how Nayeon greets us.

"I should've joined this team." Jeongyeon looks on with envy.

"How's the recording going?" I ask.

"We're waiting for Jihyo so we can start recording on some guides." Nayeon says.

Jeongyeon moves closer to the computer monitor and starts inspecting the opened file, "Is this your song?"

"Nope, that's something else I've been working on." Dahyun reaches for the computer mouse and minimizes the program. She then opens the actual SMC track with ease.

Nayeon asks if they could listen to it but Dahyun looks at me briefly so I urge her on with a smile and a subtle nod.

I see her nervousness ease as she plays the track over the speakers. We all listen to it quietly and I watch as Nayeon and Jeongyeon enjoy the instrumental track. There's no shortage of pride on their faces.

At some point, Nayeon has moved closer to Dahyun, wrapping her arms around the other's shoulders, swaying her head while enjoying the song.

When it comes to an end, we all start to slow clap for Dahyun.

"The melody sounds the same but I'm pleasantly surprised that there are so many layers to it now." you can tell Nayeon is beyond impressed while the others, except Dahyun, nod in agreement.

Jeongyeon turns to me, "please work on our track too." I know she was joking but there's so much truth to the offer as well.

"That's actually all Dahyun's doing." Pride and admiration, that's their reaction.

Dahyun on the other hand, tries to cover her face, all shy and flustered.

"That's not true. He helped me a lot." she points to me.

"Then you come work on our track as well." Nayeon offers Dahyun but Tzuyu is fast to decline on Dahyun's behalf.

"She's ours." despite her firm refusal and claim while pulling Dahyun's chair closer to her, it doesn't stop us from laughing.

"Seriously, Dahyun, this is amazing. You did really well. Can't wait to hear the full song." Jeongyeon was so proud she hugged Dahyun tightly.

Dahyun is almost teary eyed at this point and thanks everyone with a quiet voice.

"We should get going so we can finish early. You kids should too. Have fun!" Nayeon grabs Jeongyeon by the arm and starts pulling her towards the door.

"Have fun you guys." and they're off.

I come back to the three so we can get started but Tzuyu has other plans and that includes an interview.

"Where do you get inspiration to write songs?"

I'm always in awe at how soft Tzuyu's speaking voice is so there's an initial thought in my head that I need to speak to her as if there are 10 babies who are sleeping in the room with us. 

Through the times I've spoken to her, she always sounds wise beyond her years and my favourite thing about her? How playful she actually is when she's comfortable with someone.

"Anything really. It could be simple things like a flower that reminds me of someone, food, places I've visited or books I've read about."

"How about people? Have you written songs about people?"

Before I answer, I notice Dahyun suddenly became fidgety. She's not letting on that she's waiting for my answer but I could tell that she is.

"Of course. I've dated once."

"Have you written songs about her?" Tzuyu's enthusiasm has not waned a bit.

"I have. To be honest, she continues to inspire me. We're best friends and she's going to marry my other best friend soon."

A soft gasp fills the room. That's Tzuyu's reply. Chaeyoung's eyes are the size of saucers as she stares at me slack-jawed.

I take a chance and look at Dahyun and there's something new I'm seeing in her eyes. I don't understand what it is. It's a mixture of shock and sadness but mellowed out by a dozen questions probably running through her mind but doesn't have the courage to let them out.

"Your ex-girlfriend is marrying your current best friend?" Chaeyoung clarifies like the whole idea sounds like a k-drama plot twist to her.

"Yeah. We've all known each other since elementary school. We're all friends. I dated my ex-girlfriend throughout college. We broke up because we've grown into different people. We became more like siblings than lovers."

"But what about your other best friend? Did he always have feelings for her?" Tzuyu was the most invested in this story and I'm amused by how much they're entertained by my love life.

"They're the exact opposites actually. They never agreed on anything until they started to date. I guess when you get older, you learn how to compromise. My guy best friend got cheated on by his ex-girlfriend, took all the money in his ATM account, his best hoodies, even the food in his fridge. So my ex-girlfriend plotted some revenge plan and in the process of them conniving in their evil deeds, they realized that they have more things in common."

Chaeyoung and Tzuyu started slow clapping and I take that as a positive sign they've enjoyed my story.

Dahyun catches me unaware with her question, "What about you?"

My best friends told me about how they felt before confessing to each other so that form of respect and consideration was something I really appreciated.

"I'm more than happy. They've stopped fighting now which always put me in the middle, especially all those times they pulled awful pranks on each other. I do miss the pranks though."

Finally I see Dahyun smile. Was it relief? She looks like she was holding her breath for a long time and has now finally come up for some fresh O2.

"Don't you get a Plus One for the wedding?" asks Tzuyu.

"Yeah but I haven't found one yet." I answer honestly.

"You should do a plus three. Me, Chaeyoung, and Dahyun unnie. Right, unnie? He should take us with him, right?" Tzuyu excitedly waits for an answer and when she doesn't get one right away, she turns to Chaeyoung.

"Chaeng, didn't you say wedding cakes tastes the best? You were even looking for cake shops with wedding cakes you can buy." Chaeyoung is looking at her in disbelief.

"Tzuyu, I think adding guests is for the bride to decide." Dahyun explains.

"You're right," Tzuyu says absentmindedly, looking like her brain is simultaneously looking for a solution to what now seems like her problem. "I think you should tell her that you're bringing someone with you but I think it's also important that she knows we're a package deal so your invite should say plus three."

"Tzuyu..." Dahyun and Chaeyoung are both in shock but I find Tzuyu's suggestion more amusing than anything.

Tzuyu is still looking at me, most likely waiting for an answer so I respond by taking my phone out, speed dial my best friend and watch as the three of them look on as I tell my best friend and ex-girlfriend that I'm taking Twice's Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu with me to their wedding.

All my best friend says is "Okay." and we hang up. I stay on my phone, pass them the e-vite through our group chat and watch them all simultaneously check their phones.

It's official. I'm taking these three to my best friends wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading Chapter 5.
> 
> This is probably the longest chapter I've written so far and didn't expect it to get this long. It's worth it, I promise. I hope you stick around for a turn to Confusionville next chapter :)


	6. Welcome to Confusionville

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Confusionville.  
Population: 1
> 
> My relationship with Dahyun took an unexpected turn and I've never felt more lost than I have ever been in my life.
> 
> However, I've never felt so at home with her either.

My friends chose an intimate garden wedding. Most of their guests are family members I've seen since we were young so with that comes the familiar interactions you get with relatives. They're aware I used to date the bride but they've all gotten over it by now.

Since I'm practically family, I'm not immune to the mandatory questioning from relatives. "Are you seeing someone?" an aunt asked me. My answer "Yes, but unfortunately that someone doesn't see me." She ate that up, I'm telling you. There were tears in her eyes.

I was in the middle of a conversation with said aunt when from my peripheral vision I see three people enter the garden through the heavy wooden doors.

There she was, the girl of my dreams, coming to my best friends' wedding with her best friends. They're all smiles, kindly greeting guests, as they find their way around the garden when Dahyun spots me. Her smile grows even bigger as she raises her hand and waves daintily. 

This Dahyun is ethereal. So far from when I first saw her in her red track pants and white oversized tee. Nothing over the top but you can just feel the good energy radiating off of them.

I couldn't look away. I don't care that my mouth is probably agape. I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one who's openly staring. I can hear murmurs and surprised squeals mixed with the beautiful Yiruma piece being played by the string quartet.

I'm forced to look away when the aunt I was talking to grabs my arm and tells me she has to go to the ladies room.

"Hello." a unison of soft voices greet me. I whip my head to see them already standing in front of me.

"Hi. I can't believe you're here."

Tzuyu's smile falls off her face immediately and she quickly shifts to a serious tone, "you thought we'd stand you up after you kindly invited us?" she pouts the cutest pout, a weapon of mass destruction.

"Tzuyu, I'm pretty sure you invited yourself." Chaeyoung says quietly after exchanging hello's with another guest who passed by.

"Only because I know how busy you've been lately. I'm really happy you could make it."

"Don't doubt us again."

"I'm sorry I ever did." I solemnly apologize and then bow my head. "You all look very beautiful today."

"It's the makeup." they answer in unison, making us all laugh.

The string quartet starts playing the wedding march so I usher the girls to their seats. They're not with their manager, which surprised me, even though I asked for two extra seats for them.

I went straight to my best man duties, meeting the groom at the altar and checking if his bow tie is put on straight.

"The last time you had a bath, I remember we had a female president." I do my last minute check if his black suit was lint free and pat him on the shoulder to let him know that he's good to go.

"At least I don't make up stories about famous people being my plus one to a wedding."

"Maybe you should look behind you, right side, fifth row."

His face went paper white and very quietly, I'm sure only I could hear it, an expletive fell from his mouth.

"How much did you bet, traitor?"

"I wish it was just money. My pride, man...my pride. I'm scared. Really."

"After this betrayal, I'll pray for your survival, at least. For old times sake."

We're interrupted by the sounds of chairs creaking when the guests stood up. We go to our positions as we were instructed to and diligently wait for the bride.

The ceremony was solemn, there were tears and laughter, and an outpour of love from every corner. When the new husband and wife made their first walk together, I couldn't help my gaze from wandering off to the 5th row.

There she was, all smiles, throwing uncooked rice and rose petals at the couple while they passed by her row.

Who am I kidding? I'm in love with this woman. I told myself I shouldn't be but the heart wants what it cannot have and my heart wants the woman standing a couple meters away from me, beside her two best friends, looking like they're having the time of their life.

She senses my gaze like I'm a camera pointed at her because she turns her head in my direction and her smile disappears for a second. There's a question in her eyes and I answer her with a smile. Her smile returns as she tilts her head, makes small clapping gestures with her hands as if she's congratulating me.

These are our silent conversations.

My best friend calls on everyone to follow them to the reception area so I immediately make my way to Dahyun. She's not even surprised that I got to her in such a short amount of time. 

"Are you staying for my best man speech? I'll give you full rights to tease me afterwards." but she keeps her sight on the ground, making sure her heels don't dig into the grass.

I offer my arm and she holds on to it as we walk behind Chaeyoung and Tzuyu who are having fun talking to two little girls and an even smaller boy who seem like the biggest fans.

"Then I absolutely have to stay." she briefly looks up at me, eyes slightly squinting from the late afternoon sun. "It's really nice to see you in daylight, outside of a studio."

"It's nice to see you, too." and because I'm an over-thinker and I didn't want her to think I was being too straightforward, I add "and Chaeyoung and Tzuyu as well. Thank you for coming again."

"We came for the free food actually."

Yup, I'm 100% in love and 100% in major trouble.

As soon as we reach the reception area an older friend of the couple approaches us. I check on Chaeyoung and Tzuyu who are watching the little boy dance to 'Likey' before I greet the tiny, elderly woman standing before us.

"You two look so lovely together." She reaches over to gently touch Dahyun's hair like a loving grandmother.

I look around quickly, checking to see if anyone had heard. I don't want rumours to start because of me. Fortunately, the only people closest to us is Chaeyoung and Tzuyu and their tiny friends while everyone else is preoccupied.

"We're not - -"

"Thank you." Dahyun interjects and I feel her hand gently squeezing my arm in a way people won't see.

My heart starts pounding when I meet her eyes. She's smiling warmly at me but her eyes feel as if they're staring right into my soul.

For a second, I was scared she'd catch on to my real feelings but after that I smiled back, hoping she knows I wish we were more than work colleagues.

A guy comes over and gently wraps his arm around the elderly woman. He apologizes before whisking her away.

That breaks our trance and Dahyun let's go of my arm. I'm completely devastated because I miss her hand on me already.

We finally make our way to Chaeyoung and Tzuyu.

I guide them to their seats and deposit them there before I head over to the newlyweds to check if they needed anything.

They see me approaching and I can practically feel the happiness radiating off of the two best people in my life.

"Are you having regrets already?" I chide.

"As the winner of our bet, I have zero regrets but this one," she points to her husband (what a weird word), "he's going to have a lot once I carry out the terms of our wager."

"Would you blame me? Your guests aren't exactly common people like us. They're so busy taking over the world they could've just chosen to rest or spend quality time with their families. That's why I truly believe that the two of you connived against me. And you, young man, I know you have money so 'fess up right now - what's in it for you?" he looked so seriously convinced that me and his wife couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, no. You brought this on yourself."

"Does she know?" my best friend, the wife (still sounds weird), whispers to me, leaning in as far as she can go without falling off of her chair.

I copy her and lean in as well, "Who's 'she' and what does she know?" I'm confused as we're all huddled together, whisper talking like elementary school students.

"One of your pluses, dummy."

Now I'm really confused. "What did I miss?"

"I know you're a musical prodigy but sometimes you're really really slow on the uptake."

"She wants to know if "ahem ahem" knows that you have her photo card in your wallet since 2015 and that you've been madly in love with her since." 

I'm sweating bullets suddenly and panicking at the thought that someone might've overheard.

"Don't say stuff like that in public."

"It's true though! You're head over heels in love with her!"

"You stop it!" we continue to whisper bicker and only stop when a loud microphone feedback interrupts us.

The host of the evening starts his spiel and we go back to being adults celebrating this momentous occasion.

\----

After my best man speech, I head over to Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu's table with the newlyweds.

They stand up before we reach them and I start with introductions. I was a bit worried that they'd feel left out but it seems like they genuinely had fun, my friends are fans so they're pretty elated about having the three as their guests.

All was going well until the elderly woman comes back to join us. She grabs onto my arm and Dahyun's who's standing beside me.

"You never let a good woman go, you understand."

I can hear my best friends fake coughing, oblivious to the dilemma I'm in. People could be recording this very moment and having that video go around the internet would be a really really big problem for Dahyun.

I try to correct her again but Dahyun spoke first, holding the elderly woman's hand tightly in hers. "Thank you for thinking I'm a good woman."

This sends Chaeyoung and Tzuyu laughing even though Chaeyoung seemed like she was leaning towards the 'suffering from second hand embarrassment' side of the situation.

Tzuyu, my number one supporter, comes to my aid, "Omonim," she says softly and there's nothing but adoration in the elderly woman's eyes, "He's a really good guy too."

Tzuyu holds two thumbs up for me and I put my hand against my chest as a gesture of absolute happiness as if my heart is bursting from joy.

"I don't doubt it if he has such wonderful friends like you."

That's it. Dahyun, I'm sorry but I'm in love with someone else. This elderly woman has won all brownie points.

____

Before they leave they hand a gift to the newlyweds and I'm not even kidding when I tell you that my friends looked like they were gifted 5 billion won. Each.

They say their goodbyes as if they've known each other since the beginning of time and I walk them out. I finally ask about their manager but I'm quite surprised by Chaeyoung's nonchalance, "Dahyun unnie drove us."

Dahyun is in complete focused mode right now, taking her key out of her purse. I hear the beep of her unlocking car in the distance as we walk over towards the direction of the sound.

"When you attend events like this, do you have to inform the company?" 

"Not really since this is a personal schedule. When I go to the studio on Tuesday to submit the lyrics to your song, that's a work schedule."

"So...it's done?" I hope I didn't sound too eager.

"Yup. You should be the first one to read it."

"It would be my honour." I was so nervous I actually bowed. Embarrassing.

"I'm really happy that you made it." I tell them once we reach Dahyun's car.

"Well, you did invite us." says Tzuyu.

"You invited us with you, Tzuyu." Chaeyoung supplies.

"And you still haven't thanked me." she says proudly.

"Did you have a good time?"

Chaeyoung answers for them "We really did. We barely get to attend weddings since none of our friends are getting married yet. We met some good people as well and the food is fantastic. That wedding cake..."

The three of them automatically slip into a dreamy trance obviously reminiscing about the cake. I have to agree, that the food, especially the cake, was really good.

"We should take a picture before we leave." Chaeyoung is already taking out her phone and swiping on the screen to open her camera app.

She stretches her arm out and instructs us to huddle closer. Tzuyu immediately bends down beside Chaeyoung while Dahyun and I position ourselves behind them. I bend down a bit so we all fit in the frame.

Chaeyoung counts down and starts taking photos. I'm used to one shot but apparently they take about three dozen plus videos with filter. It was a challenge to keep up with poses and I think Dahyun knew.

I feel a soft hand lightly grab on to mine and I wasn't sure if it was by accident. I curl my fingers gently around hers and she squeezes lightly as we continue to take 50 more.

As soon as we're done, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu inspect the shots right away. 

I take my phone out and offer to take pictures of them and they happily stand together and pose. I count down and take a couple shots. Tzuyu then comes up with the idea that each of them take a picture with me and offers to go first.

I ask her what pose we should do and she says she wants a regular one and something like her putting me in a choke hold. I thought that was a joke. I now have pictures of Chou Tzuyu strangling me.

Chaeyoung and I did a regular one standing side by side and one where we have our backs together while holding our hands up like guns. I felt beyond cool.

When it was mine and Dahyun's turn, it seems that Tzuyu never runs out of ideas as she wants us to pose like a married couple.

Chaeyoung runs off somewhere and Dahyun goes into position calmly while I'm having an internal panic and my mouth suddenly goes dry.

Chaeyoung comes back, holding a bunch of flowers she's picked up off of the side and hands them to Dahyun like a bouquet.

Tzuyu takes my phone and hands it over to Chaeyoung, grabs me by the arms and positions me next to Dahyun. Tzuyu then walks backwards while Chaeyoung is already snapping photos.

"Unnie, you should grab his arm." Director Chou instructs. "Now smile just a tiny bit. That's it." I can hear the camera going off.

"Now smile really wide like the happy couple that you are." And we do whatever Director Chou instructs us to do.

"Now you should kiss."

I thought she was joking again so I laugh but when I look over at Dahyun, who was still facing forward, she already has her head tilted to the side with her eyes closed. Chaeyoung was still snapping and I was really really panicking.

I look back at Tzuyu just to make sure she's joking but all she does is gesture with her hands, telling me to proceed.

So I put my hands behind my back, lean in and move my face closer to hers. I close my eyes but decide not to actually kiss her. Just close enough so it'll look like I'm doing it.

I can hear Chaeyoung having the time of her life snapping away and Tzuyu joins in on the laughing party soon enough.

"Done." I hear Tzuyu say and I open my eyes to see Dahyun looking at me, our lips a breath away from each other.

I stand up straight and Dahyun starts laughing nervously. I check if anyone is around because we can never be too sure.

Chaeyoung and Tzuyu are too busy looking at the photos with googley eyes.

"If 'We Got Married' was still on, you two should go on it."

Dahyun and I look at each other for a couple seconds and burst into laughter at the same time.

Today I learned that Tzuyu is an absolute hopeless romantic and Chaeyoung, despite her quiet demeanor. is just the same.

"Before we revive the show, I think you should get going because it's getting quite late."

I open the car doors of the backseat and passenger side at the same time and wait for Chaeyoung and Tzuyu to get in. I thank them again and bid them goodbye before closing the doors.

I walk over to Dahyun who was already sitting inside. I hold onto the door and watch her as she buckles up.

"Ladies, please let me know when you get home." they answer with a resounding 'Yes".

"Drive safely." I tell Dahyun and she replies with a salute.

I close the door, step aside and watch while she drives away.

I head back to the wedding reception and the party continues for another hour before the newlyweds have to leave to catch their flight for their honeymoon.  
\-----  
As much fun as the day was, I'm absolutely ready to crash.

As soon as I get in my car, my phone starts to vibrate non stop.

I check it while putting my seat belt on. It's our SMC group chat and Chaeyoung has sent about 2 dozen of the photos we took earlier with a message at the end letting me know that they got back safely to their dorm.

A bonus photo shortly comes after of her and Tzuyu holding an A4 size paper that says "Thank you!" that I'm completely sure is Chaeyoung's doing because there's a cake drawing in one corner with the words "best cake" written under it. A little puppy on the other side of the paper, who I'm assuming is Gucci, was most likely drawn by Tzuyu.

I was in the middle of sending them their group photos when another message pops up on my notifications tab and I frown when I read Dahyun's name.

"Send me our wedding photos, honey." my jaw drops as my lungs forget how to function.

"Right away, dear." I reply with trembling hands.

Her reply comes immediately "Thanks, sweetie." My heart is in my ears and my chest feels like it's about to burst.

I send her everything and wait for a response like my life hung on to it.

"What a lovely couple we make." My heart is beating out of control and I can't feel my face from smiling a little too hard.

Another message from her comes again, "Drive safely. Will you let me know when you get home?"

"I will."

I lean my head against the headrest and blink hard several times, repeatedly asking myself whether what just happened actually happened.

A couple of weeks ago, I was trying to forget any sort of romantic feelings for Dahyun and just a while ago we held hands, took 'wedding' photos and addressed each other with terms of endearments.

She definitely took the wheel today and I'm just going along for the ride.

_______

Once I step foot in my home, I text her "Honey, I'm home." even though I'm not sure if she's still up, so I go about my nightly routine

Right before I go to bed, my phone vibrates on my bedside table and I immediately pick it up like I'm addicted to her reply and couldn't wait to get my fix. Actually, at this point, I might as well be.

A message from Dahyun sits in my inbox and I almost swallow my tongue when I see her name.

"Thank you for letting me know. We had fun today so thank you for inviting us, best man."

Then a picture arrives soon after. It's a picture of her in a face mask, holding a finger heart to her cheek while she has her eyes closed and my heart starts bouncing erratically around my chest when I read the caption she wrote on the photo. I recognize it's the lyrics to their song.

"Goodnight. Let's meet again in our dreams."

I take several deep breathes before I start typing out a reply.

"See you there. Goodnight."

I let myself float on the clouds. I listen to my heart and completely ignore the little voice in my head that's telling me that Dahyun might be feeling the same way I do. I don't know what this is or where we're going from here. Something shifted drastically and I'm both elated and scared but right now I'm just going to focus on enjoying this feeling of being on Cloud 9.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking around. I hope you enjoy this chapter :)


	7. Radio Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I think we're lost. Very, very lost.

Radio silence.

It was absolute radio silence from her for a week after the wedding.

You might be asking "then why didn't you contact her first?"

I was about to. Hear me out.

Before the wedding, our online interactions were limited to our music projects. We never contacted each other for other reasons beyond that. 

Come the wedding day, as you know, everything took a complete 180 degree turn.

It felt like getting whiplash with how fast things turned around between the two of us.

We joke around like pals when we're together but to joke around like we're ...a couple? That was a completely uncharted territory for the both of us.

I still don't know why or how Dahyun decided to dip her toes in that water.

Assuming anything that has happened was beyond 'joking among friends' could potentially hurt. Remember, she wrote the lyrics to my song not denying that she already had someone in mind.

Tuesday morning, as soon as I arrive in the recording studio, I take out my phone to ask her what time she's coming in. I completely lost count of how many messages I drafted just to ask her that. To be honest, I hesitated texting her. I hesitated a lot.

We've only contacted each other on a professional capacity before.

They didn't even contact me before the wedding.

Sometimes she'd ask me if I was at the recording studio and if I could guide her with her music related projects. That's it.

The Producer was already in the studio and as soon as I come in, he hands me a plastic folder with a single sheet of paper.

"Dahyun came in earlier."

There's a somberness in his voice that he's trying really hard to hide. Something comes over me; making me nervous.

I open the folder and read the title.

It's her song lyrics.

All he said about the lyrics were "coupled with the music, I can tell you this is on the "Be as One" level of emotional but not under the same positive light."

He looked like a father in pain who accidentally read his daughter's heartbreaking entry in her journal. Without saying anything, he looked at me with his big "I'm sorry" puppy eyes.

The kicker was that The Producer read the lyrics first. I'm sure I wasn't dreaming when she told me I had the honour of reading her lyrics before anyone else.

She came to the studio two days after the wedding like she said she would. Of course she doesn't need to tell me every time she goes here but I assumed she told me that for a reason. I guess, there wasn't anything to it, just part of her explaining to me about how schedules with managers work.

There was mistake number one, me hoping and looking into things that weren't there.

\---

I didn't have the courage to read the lyrics until after a week it was given to me even though I gave it my approval the same day I received it and let me tell you - I was furious.

It was indeed an emotional song; the story of two people who have fallen for each other but believes their feelings will end up hurting them both so one decides that before they even start a romantic relationship, in the long run, the other would be better off not knowing how she truly feels.

The person in this story tells the other through the song how she'll just love the other person from a distance and that she's come to terms with herself that it's the best for both of them.

There's a part that goes "Feelings fade away and if they don't, I'll learn to live with them."

You see where I'm getting at? How could she decide for the both of them? She gave up without giving him a chance. Why fight away the feelings when you could be with the one you love and not push them away?

However, in the grand scheme of things, whatever I believe is right or wrong doesn't matter. Ultimately, Dahyun still gets to decide how she wants to live her life and who she gives her love to.

The person she wrote this in mind will need all the hug this world has to offer.

I carried that anger until the day of recording the guide and you know what happened? It multiplied by 10 when I saw her.

For the first time, I hopped on the elevator with zero enthusiasm. People are abuzz. I didn't mean to eavesdrop but I overhear the employees and found out that a news site has released info about an unnamed idol who is caught in a dating 'scandal' and they'll start revealing more info in the coming days.

How I despise that word. Scandal? Is dating such a bad thing? That's a regular thing for humans. Idols are humans too. Now I'm even more furious on top of all these emotions brought about by one person.

When I get to the studio, Jeongyeon is already there for the guide recording, taking notes from The Producer while The Sound Engineer was checking cables in the recording booth.

I greet them politely while my eyes scan for any sign of Dahyun. Bag? Nope. Notes? Nope. Scent? Nope.

The door behind me opens quietly and without looking I knew who it was because I developed an additional sense that alerts me whenever she's around.

She greets everyone politely and quietly and I, with my raging pool of emotions, couldn't meet her eye to eye so I turn my head towards her direction, without meeting her eyes, and quickly bow my head in greeting.

She senses that I know that she broke her promise of letting me read the lyrics first.

Yep, back to square one. We're back to being professionals and complete strangers. But this time, we act like we don't want anything to do with each other.

Like we've never shared meals, talked about books we love, created music, attended my best friends' wedding together with her friends, took pictures like we were a couple and called each other honey and sweetie and...crap. Now the anger is turning to hurt I brought on myself.

Why? Because for a split second I let myself hope.

For a few moments I hoped there was more between those text messages, the jokes in front of friends.

And if I'm being honest, I'm probably more mad at myself than at Dahyun's lyrics.

I wait for her to be seated and pick the chair furthest from her, take my notes out, and pick up a headphone.

Jeongyeon cheerily calls me and asks if I was okay if she changes a few notes from the supplementary backup vocals.

I ask which part and agree that hers sound better. She then asks Dahyun who agrees as well.

The Sound Engineer asks me to put my headphones on and start on soundcheck.

She assists Jeongyeon in the booth and once everything is in place, we immediately dive in.

The recording goes smoothly. I set aside my emotions because I'm a complete professional. I mentally high five myself especially since not even once did I look at Dahyun.

That takes a lot of will power. A LOT A LOT.

We play the song back with Jeongyeon in the room with us and everyone is in complete awe at how emotional she sang the entire song.

We compliment Jeongyeon and Dahyun for the amazing work and The Producer asks Jeongyeon if she could relate to it. Since The Producer has worked with them even before their debut, they're very relaxed and open with him.

Without missing a beat, Jeongyeon answers honestly. "Of course. Our work doesn't give us many opportunities to date, especially not in the open, and if we do, we're going to subject our partner, their families, their friends to things they didn't sign up for. So, I guess, it's easier for us to ignore our feelings and just play it safe sometimes."

Jeongyeon ends her explanation by looking at me. There's something there. Especially when she punctuates it with a tiny smile.

As much as I want to, I held myself back from looking over at Dahyun to see her reaction. She's sitting somewhere beside Jeongyeon but if I look at her, it'll be too obvious so I chose not to.

When The Sound Engineer leaves the room to take a call, The Producer then shifts his attention to Dahyun.

"I guess it didn't work out, huh."

Dahyun answers honestly, much more open than the first time we talked about the lyrics. "It's better that way." she answers with a small smile that didn't reach her eyes.

My heart breaks. Jeongyeon's heart breaks. The Producer's heart breaks. In this quiet studio, it's filled with the silent sound of hearts breaking into tiny pieces.

I feel bad for whoever she wrote it for even though it still makes me angry, my heart breaks for Dahyun the most.

Pain is hitting me from all sides but I can't imagine the pain she must be going through. Setting aside your feelings just so the other person wouldn't be subjected to the pain caused by people who really have no business or say in their relationship was something I'm honestly trying to understand.

If it's scary to jump into a relationship as a regular person, it must be even more difficult for them when not only their hearts but their career and their groups career is on the line.

Jeongyeon's phone screen lights up and she proceeds to read the message. She gets up and says she has to move to the next studio for another recording. She pats Dahyun on the head while slinging her backpack over one shoulder.

They're also recording in the studio next door and since it was Jeongyeon's turn, she leaves Dahyun behind.

The Producer gets up and follows after Jeongyeon, saying he'll be back in five so we can finish the guide.

I move my chair in front of the computer and Dahyun follows, sliding her chair beside me, keeping a safe distance, while I tinker with the computer.

"What would you have done?"

My hands stop moving, her voice was quiet, perhaps the softest I've heard from her. It didn't even sound like it was her talking.

"The person in the lyrics, I mean." she clarifies when I didn't answer right away.

I make sure I understand her so I carefully ask, "If I were you or the person you wrote the lyrics about?"

No beating around the bush this time. I know we're both tired. We've already ran the full circle.

I'm in a classic tale of liking someone who likes someone else.

I chance a glance in her direction. She's looking straight ahead, her eyes are suddenly looking exhausted.

"The other person." she answers, still not meeting my eyes.

I lean my back against the chair, mimicking her, before I reply.

"In this scenario, do I know if you like me back?"

I feel her eyes on me so I turn my head to look at her.

She mulls the question over while I patiently wait.

It takes her a while to answer and I've never felt this exposed in my life.

"You know. You had to know. At least had an inkling." she answers without breaking away from our staring game.

But I do, not because it's too much but because I'm starting to think she's talking about us and that's completely delusional thinking.

If I need to help her figure things out to be with someone else, I'll do that because I will always champion for Dahyun's happiness even if it's at the expense of my own.

"Were you dropping hints?"

She looks up at the ceiling, looking completely frustrated. She lets out a sigh before answering.

"It seems like he wasn't picking them up."

I guess she fell for a clueless dumb ass.

She turns in her chair, facing me before speaking.

"If you like someone, you should let them know, right?"

I nod, not knowing where she's going with this conversation.

This person sounds like a dumb ass who didn't pick up on her clues. Deliberately. I can't tell her that right now because it might hurt her.

"If I like someone, then I'd let the person know how I feel. I can understand why you didn't, given your situation, unless you feel like that someone isn't worth taking the risk for then don't." I muster a small, genuine smile. 

She's not smiling back. Instead, she's looking at me as if she's in pain and completely frustrated and my brain is scrambling for ways to take away that look.

Then I remember Jeongyeon's words - it's easier to play it safe.

"Playing it safe isn't living nor growing, Dahyun. No one became a better person without taking risks."

I realize in that moment why I was so angry. I felt betrayed because a part of me thought about the possibility that she wrote the lyrics with me in mind and in a way, I felt as if I wasn't worth taking a risk for.

But there was a bigger part in me that was angry because I was hurt for Dahyun. She must've felt the person she wrote the lyrics for didn't think she was worth the risk either and Dahyun felt the need to retract.

I hate how Dahyun had to feel that way.

Nobody should feel like they aren't worth it.

"There's no easy relationship, Dahyun. Even folks who don't live in front of the camera have their own set of challenges. At the very least, if I like the person and they like me back, I would tell them. Give ourselves a chance."

This time I look at her. Really look at her. I watch as her expression slowly softens.

To me, she's worth taking every risk for. But I came into her life at the wrong time. Sometimes, timing is really everything.

Maybe if there wasn't someone else, I would've at least tried after getting to know her better after all these months.

I know what would entail if I listened to my feelings. I would listen to my own advice and tell her how I felt.

She must've really mustered her all to have this conversation with me and for that, I admire her courage and appreciate her for trusting me.

See, the friend zone isn't so bad.

Don't get me wrong, the pain of losing this chance to be with her is still there. It's not easy to give up feelings for someone you like and in some way, Dahyun and I share this same boat. It's just that for her, her chance at happiness is still possible.

I take in a deep breath, resolute to tell her to at least give her heart a chance at happiness instead of hurting like this but she beats me in spilling her own feelings.

"I'm scared," she says in a shaky voice, almost on a whisper, "I'm really scared because he doesn't seem to like me the way I like him."

The door opens and The Sound Engineer has come back.

"Dahyun, they need you in the next studio."

She gets up, leaves without a word and doesn't come back.  
_____


	8. The Other Side of the Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's always two sides to a story. This is a glimpse into Dahyun's world.

Dahyun's ankle was acting up again and she still had to go up to the 9th floor.

Typically, Dahyun would take the stairs but that wasn't happening today.

"The elevator it is then." she says to no one in particular. 

She had to stop talking to herself out loud she reminded herself.

It's a good thing nobody was around. It was a little habit she keeps to herself.

She arrives at the elevator entrance and it was already on the 6th so she hurriedly pushed the button before it reached her floor. 

Some floors had a lot of traffic and some were usually quiet. The top most floors are like that.

Once the doors opened, Dahyun was a bit surprised someone was already on it and it wasn't a usual face who frequented those floors.

She doesn't know everybody in the company but most of the people who work there are very familiar to her.

This one feels familiar but also new.

Dahyun knew he wasn't expecting to see her. Not to sound conceited but Dahyun knew this reaction. She sees it all the time.

It was just...different with this one.

Dahyun suddenly felt nervous. Why? She doesn't know exactly but it's the good kind of nervous. It's a good thing her hands were tucked in her pants because she suddenly felt them get clammy.

He smiled at her and Dahyun's heart made a little somersault.

Dahyun hoped she wasn't blushing or anything because that would be really awkward but that smile, wow, has she ever seen someone smile like that, she thought. It was a combination of heartwarming and a pinch of playful aimed right at her.

"Hello." he greets in a low voice.

Dahyun did not expect his voice to be that deep and it's doing numbers on her heart.

What does she do? Fix her face into a tiny frown before greeting him back.

"Hello."

His eyes lit up and Dahyun was beyond fascinated.

She almost caught a smile escaping her lips so she tried to hide it by schooling her expression to something almost expressionless.

"Up?" she asks.

He looked up at the numbers, probably to check which floor he was on, before saying yes.

That confirmed two things for Dahyun - one, he was new and two he was lost. It was rare for non-artists, trainees, and managers to go to the higher floors.

Dahyun slightly turned her head away before stepping in the elevator because she couldn't help but smile at this tall guy trying to find his way around their building.

Typically, she'd be on high alert if she got on an elevator by herself with a stranger. Incidents have happened, even within the company building.

But the way he scooted just a bit away from her, in a very subtle way, that put Dahyun immensely at ease.

"Floor?" he says one word and Dahyun's heart is already skipping 10 beats.

"9th. Thank you." she calms herself down hoping he doesn't hear how loud her heart is beating.

When the elevator doors close, Dahyun's eyes immediately wander to the strangers reflection on the elevator door.

She's used to being around really good looking people on a daily basis. Eight to be exact. She's also worked with Cha Eun Woo and survived. It was just that she couldn't keep her eyes from wandering to him.

Dahyun had no idea how long she's been staring at him through his reflection on the elevator doors until she noticed he was smiling right back at her.

She tried to hide her embarrassment by looking away.

_Why didn't they use a more non reflective material?_ Dahyun says to herself.

She waited for the awkwardness to envelop her but it didn't come.

There was a familiarity with him. A sort of calm only you can feel amongst old friends.

It felt like that with him.

Dahyun was all the more fascinated.

They shared the short ride in comfortable silence.

When they arrive on her floor, she immediately walked out and reached for the elevator buttons to stop them from closing and turned to him.

"You're new here." it wasn't a question but he straightened his shoulders.

“Yes. I have a meeting with the music department.” he suddenly sounded so formal with his deep voice.

A short sentence and Dahyun was already short circuiting.

_What is happening to me?_

“Hit the six, turn right.” she directed him where he needed to be.

"Thank you." and he's back with that smile Dahyun wanted to keep to herself.

_Whoa Kim Dahyun, where the heck did that come from?_

"You're welcome." and for the first time, Dahyun returns his smile and she finds how easy it is for her to do so.

She couldn't move her feet so she just stood there smiling at him until the elevator doors closed between them.

Dahyun had no idea what had just transpired with an absolute stranger.

Well she knows it was a shared elevator ride but there was also something there that she couldn't understand.

If there was something she was sure of, it's that there's a part of her that would like to see him again.

\---

She hasn't seen him.

Not even a glimpse and it's been weeks.

Dahyun thought maybe she just imagined him.

Nobody smiles like that, Dahyun says to herself, so of course he was a figment of her imagination.

She's in the practice room with Tzuyu while they wait for the others to come in.

She and Tzuyu had a schedule in the morning and went straight to the practice room afterwards.

Suddenly she could hear voices booming in the hallway and she knew chaos was about to arrive in their quiet space.

"Tzuyu-ah," Jeongyeon was first to come in, followed by the others who were all laughing, except for Nayeon.

"Why?" Tzuyu looks up from her phone.

"Nayeon unnie almost killed someone today."

"What?" It takes a lot to draw out that kind of surprised reaction from their maknae.

"Stop it!" Nayeon whines while plopping herself on the couch beside Dahyun, looking like she's had a roller coaster of a day and it was just beginning.

"She got startled by the composer sitting in the vocal room we eat in so she threw her phone right in his face." Dahyun almost didn't understand what Jeongyeon was talking about because she was laughing so much.

The others weren't helping either because they too were all over the place, howling with laughter.

"It really knocked him out so when we got there he was out cold on the floor and blood was coming out of his nose." Jihyo adds in between deep breaths while trying to get the story out.

"What?" she and Tzuyu were in disbelief. They were all laughing about the seriousness of the situation and it's just not adding up.

"Why are you laughing?" she asks.

"Because when we got there, Nayeon unnie was crouching beside him, sobbing like a crazy person because she really thought she killed him." Chaeyoung explains.

Jeongyeon takes Sana and pushes her down to the floor on her back.

"It was exactly like this." Jeongyeon seems to be reenacting the situation but she looked a lot like Gollum sitting beside his precious ring.

Everyone fell to the floor when Jeongyeon started imitating Nayeon.

"Excuse me, are you dead?" while repeatedly poking Sana's arm with her index finger.

Even Dahyun and Tzuyu started laughing uncontrollably. She was starting to get the context of the whole situation.

"I really thought he was dead." Nayeon deadpanned.

"Why would you ask him if he was dead then?" Mina asked, making everyone laugh harder that Jihyo and Momo started wiping tears from their eyes.

When everyone has almost recovered, as expected, Tzuyu asked if he wasn't dead, which sent everyone laughing again.

"Tzuyu-ssi," Jihyo says, "I don't think any of us would be laughing right now if that were the case."

Nayeon suddenly sat up and started relaying everything that has happened.

"I honestly thought he was a trainee." Sana says.

"Me too!" Momo agrees.

"Dahyun unnie, he's the one who composed the track you wanted to write lyrics for. The melancholic ballad." Chaeyoung explains.

"You should've met him," Nayeon says while getting up, "Piano man played a bit and he's seriously good."

"We had a mini concert and he just played songs by ear." she could tell Chaeyoung was already a fan.

"Of course Dahyun is still the best!" Sana comes over to hug her and their choreographer arrives in that exact moment.

Dahyun could tell everyone had fun despite the accident and there was something Dahyun couldn't help but think about - she really wanted to meet Piano Man.

\---

It took 40 days before Dahyun saw him again.

In all places, it was in a meeting which she ran late for.

She hates being late for anything and that wasn't the impression she wanted to leave with him. It was just that she had some personal things she had to suddenly take care of.

She tried to enter the conference room as subtly as possible but the creaky door stopper wouldn't let her.

Their manager rolled a seat for her between Nayeon and Jihyo and she quietly apologized before taking her seat.

It was so quiet it didn't even sound like a meeting.

"As I was saying," Dahyun immediately whipped her head to find that familiar voice and her heart did all sorts of gymnastics when she found out who it belonged to.

It's him.

He's explaining things and going back and forth with the PD and other executives, flawlessly answering questions thrown at him with a smile.

Seeing that smile again made Dahyun realize she was sure she didn't make him up.

Dahyun knew she was staring at him but she couldn't look away. She did try and hide her smile because that would just make her look weird.

What's weirder was that she was feeling beyond happy.

He was sitting on the other side of the table, at the farthest end and once he's done talking, Dahyun had no reason to glance over that direction.

_That's right, I'm just looking my fill._ Dahyun mentally high fives herself.

Once they call for a lunch break, everyone immediately clears the room.

Dahyun doesn't get on the elevator right away, hoping she'd see him come out.

She wasn't sure why she was doing all this but she knew it was absolutely crazy.

The other elevator opens and Dahyun was about to get on when she realized her little pouch holding her cards was missing.

"Dahyun, get in." Jeongyeon calls to her.

"Go ahead, I think I forgot my pouch in the conference room."

"Okay, see you downstairs. Don't take too long."

Dahyun didn't wait for the elevator doors to close, she ran back to the conference room, lighter on her feet.

Before she could push the door open, she took in a deep breath and turned the knob.

She peaked in and the first person she sees is him.

Dahyun noticed he was in the middle of doing some sort of hip exercise but abruptly stopped.

"Forgot something," Dahyun immediately walks over to the chair she previously occupied and she finds her pouch right away, "found it."

Not that he was asking but he was looking at her curiously.

Dahyun couldn't help but laugh out loud when he holds up both hands and gives her an enthusiastic thumbs up.

“Are you going for lunch?” he asks.

“Yeah, just downstairs.” she says. “Would you like to join us?”

Dahyun suddenly realized that perhaps that was a little too straightforward.

She wanted to run out when she saw the hesitation in his eyes.

“My date’s already got us delivery.” he tilts his head towards The Producer who was busy looking at his phone with airpods in his ears.

Dahyun wasn't sure why she was so happy finding out he's got a good sense of humor. It made her feel at ease.

They talked about the cafeteria menu and saving each other from falling asleep during the meeting.

Dahyun realized how easy it was to talk to him. Despite only meeting him a couple times, their conversation flowed well.

Another thing she noticed was a fading bruise across the bridge of his nose.

It was like an automatic response, Dahyun moved closer to him, her gaze never leaving his nose.

"What happened to your nose?" She didn't intend for that to come out too breathy and once she realized what was happening, they we're already standing a little too close to each other.

Before she got an answer, a single knock came and the door opened.

It was the delivery man from downstairs carrying a tray of food that seems to come from the company cafeteria.

“You should get back to your date.” She says, her eyes not leaving his.

“I should get back to my date.” he doesn't seem to want to have his lunch, he's just staring back at her with a smile Dahyun came to realize was something she didn't mind looking at.

"Dahyun, come join us." The Producer calls for her.

Both of them realized that they weren't alone in the room, prompting them to step back from each other immediately.

Dahyun politely declined and The Producer tells her to eat well and enjoy her lunch.

She looks over at him, catching him staring at her, "I will and you too." she then starts walking backwards towards the door. A graceful exit is what she needed.

Dahyun left the conference room lighter on her feet. It was the same rush she felt after performing.

She walks to the elevator and just like everything is going right for her, it was open and empty.

Once she gets on, she leans her head back against the wall and stares at her reflection on the elevator doors.

There was something different about her. Something was changing and she couldn't help but laugh.

"Admit it, Dahyun, you have a crush."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it's okay that I changed the perspective on Dahyun's part. It will follow this format when the story is told from her perspective.


	9. Unlucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There’s still a lot of questions  
I’m afraid I’m wrong again  
by a tiny fraction of the time..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is brought to you by IU's Unlucky.

"Dahyun!"

Dahyun turned around at the sound of the familiar male voice.

As she expected, a sunbae was walking towards her, his steps were bouncy and Dahyun was delighted to see him.

"I honestly never know what color your hair would be whenever I see you. Any color really suits you." he seemed to be fascinated while looking at her head.

"It's good to look at but not to touch. It's really damaged. The people at the hair salon treat it like a dying flower."

"That's the price we gotta pay. Speaking of hair salon, I bumped into someone when I went there yesterday."

Dahyun had a feeling she knew who he was talking about based on the teasing smile on his face.

"He said you were very nice when he called you. Be honest, you like him, don't you?"

Dahyun was saved from answering when suddenly, her sunbae's eyes shifted to something behind her.

"Hey, man! Good to see you again! What brings you here?"

Dahyun couldn't believe her eyes when she turned to look and saw the person she's been wanting to see, standing beside her. She suddenly wondered how much of their conversation he had heard.

The tiny voice in her head was chanting "it seems like this isn't just a little crush anymore." She shuts it down while trying to focus on the situation.

She watched as the two shook hands and bro hugged but something caught Dahyun completely off guard.

"Good to see you, too." Dahyun knew she was blushing when he looked at her smiling, as if he meant that he was more happy to see her instead of her sunbae.

She wondered if she was hallucinating. She must be, she thought. They just saw each other the day before.

Admittedly, Dahyun felt the same. It was good seeing him and if she was completely honest with herself, she was more excited to bump into him than a sunbae she hasn't seen in ages.

"Who are you working with?" her sunbae asked him.

As an answer, he tilts his head towards Dahyun.

"For real?"

Dahyun wasn't sure what was transpiring but her sunbae seemed very surprised.

"Dahyun, listen. I worked with this guy. He's brilliant. He was so much younger back then but his skills are out of this world. He composed the soundtrack for the drama I was in. This guy is magic. You're going to get a masterpiece from him."

"I appreciate the compliment but are you trying to market me? I've already signed a contract, just so you know."

"You did? You know I've been trying to get you to work with me and my group but you're always busy. I feel a little wounded right now."

"Not always busy. I'd say you have the worst timing."

Dahyun was fascinated watching the exchange.

"The offer is still up. We're planning a comeback, come work with us."

Dahyun felt brave and butted in, "I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news but he's going to be ours for a long time. Might want to look somewhere else if you want to come back soon."

Dahyun wanted to steal a glance for a reaction but her nerves were now getting the best of her. She could tell he was smiling widely at her remark and Dahyun felt smug for some reason.

"I know he has a lot of songs. He just has to give us some of it."

"They took a huge chunk of it actually. She's going to write lyrics for one of them."

"Oh, I see how it is."

"I'm sorry, man. Like she said, I'll be hers for a long while."

'_Hers_' not '_theirs_'. Dahyun's heart was doing somersaults.

Dahyun finally looked at him. Her heart forgetting how to properly function.

_I'll be hers for a long while._

He probably didn't mean anything personal by it other than working with her professionally but Dahyun's brain was starting to read into things she shouldn't be.

She suddenly felt lighter, like the softest breeze would carry her with it yet it left Dahyun feeling unabashedly happy.

"You know I'm never giving up, right?" She knew this sunbae was persistent.

"Look at the time. It's 2pm already. Dahyun and I have some work to do. We better get going."

"Yes, we should" Dahyun agreed, almost turning around to follow him.

"Seriously, man? We just saw each other. Let's grab some coffee first."

"We gotta start on time so I can go home early and maybe write a song for your group."

"Finally!" 

They were about to walk away when Dahyun's sunbae dropped a bomb that would completely change the mood.

"Don't keep her in the studio too much so she can go out on dates."

"The group's been pretty busy these days." Dahyun doesn't know why she said that.

"No one is ever too busy. We make time for the people we like."

He then starts walking backwards, still talking.

"He said he's going to give you a call."

The only response Dahyun's brain could come up with was an awkward chuckle.

"Take care, Dahyun!"

"You too." the words barely wanted to come out.

"Dude, I have your number. I'll give you a call sometime."

"I'll wait for it."

They both watched for a while as her sunbae walked away.

"Don't worry, I won't keep you long today." he's looking at her but the smile was completely gone from his face.

Dahyun felt the air between them shift or at least on her end.

There wasn't a need to clarify that she wasn't seeing anyone because they weren't in that sort of relationship but Dahyun didn't want him to think that she was dating either.

"Let's go?" the polite smile was back. He might've let her lead the way but he also left Dahyun in a puddle of confused emotions.

\---

Dahyun knew her deadline for the song lyrics was looming but she wasn't confident with the ones she's written so far.

The music was beautiful and she felt a connection with it right away. They gave her the right to compose lyrics for it because she begged them and if she submitted something for the sake of beating her deadline, she felt like it would be a disservice to the composer.

They've been through meetings after meetings discussing the whole album. Songs, concepts, lyrics, everything.

It seems like everything was progressing except Dahyun's lyrics.

Now she's back in another meeting with The Producer who was sitting at the head of the table.

Dahyun looked across the table and she finds herself locking eyes with the person her eyes kept wandering to whenever they're in the same room.

_What is he smiling so big for?_

_That smile's the very reason I can't get anything done lately._

_Look at those pearly whites and that cute little crooked left incisor.  
_

_No one should be allowed to look good with messy hair._

_It looks soft though._

_Must be nice having healthy hair._

_Heavens, I miss my healthy hair._

"It's a confession song."

Dahyun abruptly looks over to The Producer, her thought interrupted.

Then it slowly sinks in. They knew it's a confession song. For Dahyun, the melody alone felt like it was about emotions you can't tell someone personally so in a way, you do the cowards way and write lyrics confessing how scared you are that you like someone a little too much.

“Well…-I uh…it’s…the uh...”

“Are you waiting for this relationship to progress?" The Producer was like their Dad in the music department so him asking her this was nothing compared to the Dad jokes he's thrown at them over the years. They endured them all.

“It’s –“

_Dahyun, don't look over at him. He'll see right through you._

“I'd love for this song to be on the album so this guy better confess before the album comes out.”

“It’s not like that.” _Yeah, one-sided crushes really suck._

Dahyun chances a glance across the table when she notices him lower his head.

_Does he still think I'm seeing someone?_

Dahyun didn't know why she was surprised when he looked back up, locked eyes with her and kept the same smile.

_He's not even affected that I could be seeing someone. I guess he really doesn't like me._

"Dahyun, what's your schedule like today?"

Dahyun looks over at the producer who was looking down on his phone.

"It's just this really."

He holds his phone up and says “I really have to take this call,” and excuses himself. Before he’s out of the studio, they hear him answer until his voice is abruptly cut off by the door closing.

And then there were two.

“Are you going to record the guide yourself?”

_Really? Back to work?_

_Of course, Dahyun, that's why we're here._

BE _more like him, Kim Dahyun, not _LIKE _him._

“I already made a deal with Jeongyeon unnie so she’s going to do it.”

“I see.”

It was just dead air for the next few minutes.

_What is this suffocating silence?_

“Since you’ve written lyrics and you're composing now, is there anything else you haven’t tried with music?” she was grateful he broke the silence.

A window of opportunity has presented itself for Dahyun.

She straightened her back, resolute to stay professional but not easily give up on her crush. No one says she can't have a crush on him. Their dating ban's been lifted.

_It's just a little crush anyway. What's the worst that could happen?_

“I’d love to learn more about the technical aspects of song writing and producing. Chaeyoung worked with Garage Band before but I’d love to learn how to operate those.” She points at the computers and sound equipment near the window of the recording booth.

“I could teach you while we wait.” and he finally breaks into a big smile.

Dahyun missed that smile.

CALM DOWN, KIM DAHYUN. YOU'RE WORKING COLLEAGUES! STOP ACTING LIKE THERE'S MORE TO THAT SMILE!

They move over to the computer to start their lesson and Dahyun couldn't be happier.

As soon as he starts explaining how things worked, Dahyun's elation to learn grew with her admiration for him.

She's grateful that Google and Youtube exists because she's learned so much about him as a composer and producer but working with him and experiencing his work ethic first hand was how she really felt grateful to be able to work with some of the best in the industry.

He's so humble with everything he's achieved at such a young age that Dahyun couldn't help but admire him even more.

The hours passed and Dahyun didn't even notice until The Producer came back.

It was always like that with him. Time and everything else ceased to exist.  
\---


	10. It's the little things that always have the biggest impact

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I like your familiar feeling  
I like your awkward way of talking  
How about you? What about me?"

Dahyun's eyes went back and forth between him and Tzuyu as the two were locked in a staring contest while sitting across from each other, an open bag of sweet potato chips between them.

This game has been going on for 10 minutes.

He counts down from 3 to 1 and both make a quick grab for the same chip from the foil bag.

"I knew you we're going for the big one!" Dahyun laughs as Tzuyu whines with the cutest smile on her face, a dimple prominent on her cheek.

"It was closer to me." he proudly chews on the chip while Tzuyu gently shakes the bag, shuffling the contents inside.

They explained the mechanics of the game to her: three seconds to stare at the chips, then see if they both pick the same chip. The person who picks it up first gets to eat it.

The two have played the game every time he brought bags of sweet potato chips. It was something the two shared and Dahyun was a bystander to their adorable friendship.

Dahyun's secret: Watching him make Tzuyu laugh makes her heart all soft and gooey.

* * *

  
Dahyun always loved watching someone's hands play an instrument.

It was both mesmerizing and captivating.

But Dahyun finds herself in one of the craziest moments of her life. 

There she was watching him play the violin while teaching her members how to play a note when her mind suddenly wondered about his hand and how it would feel like holding it in hers.

Dahyun suddenly got up, startling Tzuyu, Mina, and Jihyo.

"Unnie, are you okay?"

"I forgot to wash my hands."

Dahyun hurriedly walks out the studio knowing four pair of eyes were following her.

Dahyun's Secret: She thought about holding his hand more often than she cared to admit.

* * *

  
One thing that Dahyun really likes is that they now have more control and input with the music and concept they want to put out.

Even though the final decision and direction still comes from the higher ups, being able to contribute means a lot to them.

With this, it also means they sit down on more meetings.

They meet more production people and bounce ideas off of each other. Dahyun discovered that that was one of her favourite things to do recently.

Since some of his songs are involved in future releases, he's been sitting down on meetings as well.

Dahyun catches herself staring at him more and more lately. She wasn't sure whether he notices it or he's just too polite to call her out on it.

Dahyun thinks he's really good looking, not too out there but definitely has boyish charms, a touch of rugged if she's going to talk about his perpetually unkempt hair, but always dressed neatly and comfy.

She liked that he has kind eyes that surprisingly turn into half moons when he smiles.

Dahyun couldn't stop herself from melting at the thought of his warm smile whenever he sees her for the first time when they meet and the way he smirks when he's being his usual playful self.

_Scratch that, he is good looking and he downplays it a lot. He's the kind of good looking person who's completely unaware that he has an effect on people._

Dahyun slightly shakes her head, ridding herself of thoughts that are of no use to their meeting.

"Are you okay?" suddenly looking up at him, Dahyun is taken aback by how close his face was to hers. His head tilted sideways, eyes full of concern.

The chorus to Likey starts playing in her head and she shuts it down with another slight head shake which he probably mistook as an answer, his eyebrows drawing closer together.

"Just refreshing my brain." she awkwardly chuckles.

He mimics her head shake and blankly stares at her for a solid three seconds before speaking, "It didn't work."

"You okay?"

"Just a bit dizzy."

They both laugh at how silly it all seems but to Dahyun, laughing with him over these silly little things has become the highlight of her day.

* * *

  
Dahyun is in the booth, waiting to record. On the other side, she could see him laughing with Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung.

She watches as he puts on a blank expression, staring into the unknown right above Chaeyoung's head and Jeongyeon mimics him, Chaeyoung drops on the couch in laughter before the three laugh in unison.

Nothing made sense to Dahyun but she catches herself smiling.

Dahyun adored Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung's sense of humor, or the lack of it that makes it so funny, and the fact that he vibes well with them.

When he's with the two, Dahyun looked like she didn't exist. When his attention is on someone, he gives them his 100%.

Sometimes, it's the same thing when he's working with Mina on her song or when he's making midi's with Chaeyoung.

Dahyun's Secret: Sometimes she daydreams about him being a permanent fixture in their lives. She knew her members would love it as well.

* * *

  
Dahyun typically leaves reading at home but not only does she have time to kill, she couldn't put the book down.

"That's a good read." he immediately comments as soon as he enters the studio.

Dahyun was surprised that he's read it. It's not the typical book she thought guys would read because the author was known for writing books that men loved to burn while they cook their meat.

"Why would anyone believe in something as unproven and as unpredictable as fate?" He quotes the opening line in the first page while pulling a chair to sit on.

"I see you've read the first page."

"I got until half of page two."

"Library?"

"Bookstore. Plastic seal was broken. They sold the copy at a lower price because someone wrote very unsavory commentaries on the cover. Poor book."

"Such sad fate." Dahyun knew those things were usual occurrences.

"Do you believe in fate?" he asks while rolling his chair closer to the table.

"Not really."

"Seems like you."

"Why does that sound like an insult?" Dahyun pretends to be offended by crossing her arms in front of her.

"It's not. Take it as a compliment. I like how realistic you are."

"Seems like you believe in fate."

"Now that sounds like an insult."

"It's not!" Dahyun was laughing now, her defensive act broken, "but you do, don't you?"

"Of course. But you don't leave everything to fate."

"What does that mean?"

"If I said no to the offer to sell my music, we might not be sitting here. Me coming here was a choice."

"Then how does fate work if you base it on choices we make?"

"Because fate will find a way for us to meet sooner or later, one way or another."

"In what ways would that be?"

"If I just asked the receptionist to repeat which floor I was supposed to be on, I wouldn't have met you earlier on that shared elevator ride. When I came down, he apologized because he said the wrong floor."

Dahyun couldn't help but smile at the realization that he was right.

"Why didn't you just ask me if you were lost?"

"I was really nervous that day."

"I could tell."

A blush quickly engulfed his face up to his ears, turning them a deep red.

_I'm in so much trouble with this one._

"I never thought I'd meet you like that. I was a bit embarrassed."

"Before you actually met me, did you think we'd ever meet?" Dahyun had no idea where she was pulling all the straight forwardness from.

"Our industry is small and fate likes to meddle."

"That's not a yes."

"It's not a no either. That's why the author mentioned in Chapter 13 -"

"You're skeptical of fate until it proves you wrong." Dahyun continues for him. It was one of her favourite chapters and Dahyun was pleasantly surprised that he remembers it and has read past the second page like he said.

"Besides, I heard if you go up to Namsan tower during a full moon and shout 50 times the name of the person you want to see, you're going to get your wish...and your name is also going on the admin ban list."

_Was that a slip of the tongue? Is he talking about me? He's talking about me! He wanted to see ME!_

"You made that up, didn't you?" Dahyun wanted to tease him about shouting her name up at Namsan tower but he thought she was asking about something else.

"The Namsan wish? People actually do that."

She knew it was a joke because he had that goofy smile on his face. Dahyun needed to say something before he gets to thinking she's fishing for info, which she was but didn't want him to find out.

"Well, we should thank fate for bring you and your quality music to us."

Dahyun couldn't believe fate had just proven it's existence to her.

Dahyun Fact: She loves books.

Dahyun's Secret: He's become her favourite to read.

* * *

  
"Why?"

He wasn't even looking yet he sensed Dahyun was staring at him.

It made her chuckle.

He looked up from his sheet music to look at her.

"Have you ever considered becoming a performer? An idol, maybe?"

"Can I take that as a compliment?"

"You should."

His lips turned to a big goofy grin.

_Was that a little too straight-forward? I sounded like I was flirting! Damage control!_

"The unnies thought you were a trainee when they met you."

"Ah, so you know about that."

"They were laughing at Nayeon unnie during practice that day."

"Is that why you went close to my face like this and asked about my bruised nose?" he reenacts that time she went back for her pouch in the conference room after the meeting.

"I didn't connect the dots right away." Dahyun hoped he didn't hear her gulp.

"I used to perform in a band with friends during high school and college."

"'Met some people in my final year in high school through a school talent show, someone was scouting for me to be in a band but I already had plans for college."

"Then I met more people freshman year and that's when I officially started composing and selling my work. I did music for film majors, that's how I started doing soundtracks."

"It's cheaper to pay college students for work than hire actual veterans. The entertainment business, as you know, is a dirty business. Yet here we are."

"Here we are." Dahyun understood.

"My band mate from college has a small acoustic lounge, I play there sometimes."

"Really? That's so cool."

"It's fun. You should come and take your members or your friends with you. PD-nim actually goes there."

Dahyun really wanted to go so she promised to see him when she gets the chance.

* * *

  
Besides Dahyun's members, he was the only other person Dahyun can argue, debate, and disagree with on any topic, no matter the subject, almost to a degree where it's almost close to a heated argument. Sometimes even from the smallest things.

"French fries - ketchup or mayonnaise?" he asks.

Dahyun looks down at the phone in her hand when it vibrates and sees a message from Mina.

She wondered what it could be about when Mina was just sitting over at the couch beside Momo.

**Mina: Ketchup. Sorry. I overheard.**

Dahyun's phone vibrates again with another text from Mina.

**Mina: btw, Momo says mayo. Don't listen to her.**

**Momo: Mayo. Mayo on everything.**

"Ketchup." Dahyun answers him.

"Mayo."

They hear Momo exclaim from the couch, eyes fixed on her phone, "Good choice!"

Dahyun's Secret: she liked that they didn't agree on everything.

* * *

  
They decided to eat at the cafeteria with Chaeyoung and Tzuyu but both suddenly bailed at the last minute. This wasn't the first time the two invited him for dinner only to "suddenly" remember a "schedule" and then dip.

On their way to the cafeteria, Tzuyu hurriedly excused herself. Dahyun knew Tzuyu was pretending to take a call because it was the same strategy they used the last two times they did it.

Dahyun stood even closer to Chaeyoung, whispering in the others ear when she saw him take out his phone.

"Chaeyoung, don't you dare -"

"Chaeyoung," the three of them looked over at the approaching Tzuyu, "unnie called and said to meet her out front, we need to go to the uh, the fitting right now. Just you and me."

That was a big fat lie because Dahyun knew they already did their fitting in the morning before they came to the office.

Dahyun was about to call her out to wipe the big smile off of her face when he stepped forward "Let me walk you both out."

Both Tzuyu and Chaeyoung suddenly started running towards the building entrance.

_C'mon! A little subtlety!_

"We'll be fine! Enjoy your dinner!" Chaeyoung shouts over her shoulder without stopping.

_Wait until I get home later._

"Shall we?" then they started walking towards the counter.

"Just you two again?" the ahjumma greets them.

"Yes." they answer in unison.

Their trays started to fill up. He helped her organize her plates so everything would fit.

Dahyun couldn't stop thinking about his story. How it was almost movie like. He dates his childhood best friend, they break up and she ends up with his other childhood best friend. He looked so happy talking about how his favourite people in the world were about to marry.

She looked over at him, watching as he received a small plate of acorn jelly on his almost full tray of food, he's nodding while the cafeteria ahjumma talked to him.

He's smiling so warmly that for a fraction of a second, Dahyun wanted that smile to be redirected at her.

And as if he can hear her thoughts, he looked over at Dahyun with the warm smile she wanted for herself.

She stood there, captivated, and perhaps a little guilty for being greedy.

_I wonder how it feels like to be his favourite person._

Dahyun thought to herself that they have songs in their group discography that would encompass her feelings at that moment.

"I put extra peppers for you, Dahyun."

Immediately, Dahyun's attention went to the small dish being placed on her tray.

"Ah, thank you so much."

"Enjoy your meal."

The cafeteria wasn't packed as usual even though it was dinner time.

"I guess people decided to go home early or eat out."

There he goes again. 

"How do you do that?" Dahyun rounded a small table and picked the chair across from him, depositing her tray gently.

"Do what?"

"It's like you were reading my thoughts just now."

They sat down, not bothering to remove their plates from the trays for easy clean up.

"About the lack of people?"

"Yeah."

Dahyun was wiping her chopsticks with a napkin when she looked up and was completely caught off guard.

He was staring at her, expressionless, unmoving in his chair.

Dahyun stared back, reached over to take a napkin from the napkin dispenser and picked up his chopsticks, then their spoons, and wiped them before placing them back down on a napkin.

As if they didn't just have a staring contest, Dahyun watched him pick up his chopsticks, utter a silent thanks and stare at his plate of acorn jelly.

"Let's...eat."

This wasn't the first time Dahyun saw him stare at acorn jellies as if they were puzzle pieces he needed to solve before he can proceed eating the other foods on his tray.

It finally dawned on her why when she heard him audibly swallow.

Without second thoughts, Dahyun picked up her peppers and replaced his acorn jellies with them.

"Why don't you tell the ahjumma you don't eat them?" Dahyun proceeds to dig into her rice bowl.

"Why don't you tell them you're not good with spicy food?"

Again, they stare at each other until both of them end up quietly chuckling.

He leans forward before speaking on a whisper, "I can't bare to tell her I don't like acorn jellies when she was so proud telling me how she makes them from scratch." he nonchalantly shrugs one shoulder before proceeding to eat.

_God, help me, he's adorable and is completely unaware of it._

"You?"

"I was about to tell her but I got distracted." Dahyun eats a piece of acorn jelly only for it to go down the wrong pipe when he spoke.

"By what?"

_You_. she almost blurted out.

"Here." he hands her a glass of water and Dahyun immediately reaches for it.

_Please don't let me die in front of him like this._

Dahyun thanks him after a few chugs of water.

"You okay?"

"Uh huh."

"What distracted you?"

"There was a - a something. It was on your right shoulder. It was huge. A huge bug."

Dahyun tried to hide her smile when he abruptly looked at both of his shoulders and then craned his neck to look at his back.

"Don't worry, it's gone."

Dahyun hid her chuckle while pretending to clear her throat.

He, too, clears his throat while straightening his shoulders, "I'm not scared of bugs."

Dahyun couldn't hide her smile anymore so she stopped trying.

"I'm _very_ scared of them. One ended up in my ear and I had to go to the hospital."

"Don't worry. I'll defend you."

"But you didn't," Dahyun's heart made a tiny flip at the cute way he said it, "you just looked at it."

"I'm sorry, it flew before I could do something. See, I scared it away for you. Telepathically."

Dahyun wondered if he knew she was making the whole bug thing up.

"You weren't even looking at it."

"I was!"

"Was I the bug?"

"You're the second bug."

"This company needs some serious pest control."

They both laugh and Dahyun already felt full just hearing his embarrassed laughter while his whole face turned a deep red.

Dahyun's Secret: _I've been defenseless against his smile from the beginning. Why should I keep fighting this battle I know I'm never going to win?_

* * *

  
They had food delivered to their meeting.

They were all helping each other organize the dishes on the long conference table.

Once settled in, Dahyun didn't realize she ended up sitting beside him. 

Dahyun was oblivious to the fact that Nayeon, Jeongyeon, and Jihyo were watching them wordlessly exchange side dishes.

Nayeon was picking at her salad. Jeongyeon and Jihyo however, were watching Dahyun closely, hands clasped formally on the table.

Nayeon pursed her lips, trying not to smile but failing once she meets Jihyo and Jeongyeon's eyes, their expressions mimicking hers.

Nayeon, Jeongyeon, and Jihyo's Secret: Dahyun was finally in love but didn't know it yet.

* * *

  
All nine of them were in various disguises, even their manager. It wasn't hard because they had face masks on and some of them were in caps and hats. They also came in at different times and in groups of 5, sitting in different tables at the lounge.

Dahyun couldn't tell whether she was nervous or excited. She mentioned to her members about him inviting them to watch him perform and they all were very excited to go see him.

They went in disguise when they found out the music lounge was near his university but they were also surprised that it wasn't what they were expecting. It was one of those cozy but classy music lounges. The place was packed.

Jeongyeon who was sitting beside Dahyun gently elbowed her to get her attention. Dahyun looked at a small board Jeongyeon was pointing at.

It had their evening special. No heavy meals, just cocktails and small plated meals. Jeongyeon was explaining some of it to Dahyun and they planned on coming back to try the food.

Not tonight though because eating means they had to take off their masks and stay longer. They were only going to stay for his set because not only were they dead tired but they had to get up early the next day.

A microphone feedback filled the place and they immediately turned their attention to the now well lit stage. Dahyun had to crane her neck a bit because they had to sit in the far back where it was a bit dark.

They didn't tell him they were coming to watch him.

As a group, they could easily, unintentionally, take away the spotlight from someone else. It's happened before so they wanted to avoid that.

Dahyun's heart was pounding in her chest. She was too nervous to notice that their manager ordered drinks for them.

She sat in her seat, wringing her hands together.

"Hello. Thank you for coming tonight. I hope you enjoy my set." He slings his guitar strap around his neck and Dahyun thought the gesture already had her heart pounding.

The place was packed and obviously there were a lot of regulars there that cheered him on. He was smiling and laughing with them, even joking at some point. 

He performed original songs and some covers using his guitar and the baby grand behind him.

Their group was the loudest to cheer for him that other people would actually laugh when it got too much.

Dahyun didn't expect his final song to be an acoustic cover of 'Say Yes'.

Nayeon and Momo who were sitting at the next table, Jihyo and Jeongyeon beside her, audibly gasped when he started singing the first lines "Would you be my love? Say yes."

Dahyun forgot to breathe. The lyrics were thoughts she often had when it came to him.

_Why is my head_   
_Filling up with you?_   
_I don’t understand_   
_Why is it you?_

But Dahyun had answers.

_I like your familiar feeling_   
_I like your awkward way of talking_   
_How about you? What about me?_

The answers were always there for her. She just chose to ignore them.

_Who cares if it’s a bit awkward?_   
_I’m worried too_   
_But I’ll show you_   
_A side of me_   
_That I’ve never shown anyone else before_

Dahyun was overwhelmed. She was both happy and scared by the realization of how deep her feelings were for him. Her hands were cold and shaking and she was biting down on her lip too hard but she didn't care.

_Why do you keep laughing?_   
_I don’t know, what am I doing?_   
_Answer me, what do I do?_   
_Say yes_

_Would you be my love?_   
_Say yeah_   
_Say yes_

As he wrapped his performance to the roaring cheer of the crowd, Dahyun kept repeating the song in her head. 

_But I’ll show you_   
_A side of me_   
_That I’ve never shown anyone else before_

_..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm sorry the update took forever despite me having finished writing this months ago. There are a lot more chapters left and I might post the remaining ones on Mondays around 6pm KST...and maybe twice a week? I hope you continue to enjoy it. Thank you always for leaving comments and kind words.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading Fate.
> 
> I'm not sure if there's an audience for this type of AU tbh. I tremendously enjoyed writing this story because Dahyun falls in love with a non idol and exploring that dynamic while incorporating facts about the members into the story was unexpectedly very fun for me.
> 
> Also, I thought it would be fun to break the 4th wall.
> 
> You can follow me on Twitter for future updates
> 
> twitter.com/twicesgrey
> 
> Thank you for stopping by!


End file.
